Today, I woke up after a night of partying and heavy drinking. Apparently word travels quickly, because everyone now knows that I spent hours lying in an empty bathtub, rubbing shampoo over my body with the expectation that it'd increase my penis size. FML
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By
mpsteve137
| 15
Wtf, you're supposed to use conditioner to do that. Duh
Reply
Damn_Hippster
| 11
Wait your telling me that DOESN'T increase my penis size??! All the those lonely nights rubbing shampoo on myself for nothing!!
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Dr0reos
| 8
Really because ive had good results with head and shoulders shampoo
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Trisha_aus
| 15
Hangover 3
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JocelynKaulitz
| 28
You're supposed to use the shampoo that helps prevent dryness and add more volume…
Reply
xalba
| 9
Hahaha that funny
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The_CL0GGER
| 0
umm... There are about 7 things that points to YDI in this FML.
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Inheritance
| 10
Question is OP did it work?
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EvilPotato
| 14
35 oh ya tell me about it, nothings worst than dry pubic hair. Gotta keep it moist.
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yuggi1
| 11
You people are so off! The only shampoo that works for that is the one with the stallion logo. Never heard of the reference; hung like a horse? Yup.
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yellowpuppies
| 5
Dude I thought it was soap
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SuperKnuckels
| 6
naw none of those products will work. But.. Smuckers will... unless thats too fancy for you.
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GaleHawthorne
| 0
Ron Jeremy was wrong? ;(
By
bete_noire_fml
| 7
Yep, think we've all been there.
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Dr0reos
| 8
Yeah I once got really coked up on bath salts and bit off a hobos face by the side of the road.
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NoYDI
| 4
Sorry for party rockin'!
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kyleekay
| 25
Oh, we've totally all been there.
Took me a while of frustrating failed drunken attempts before I realized I didn't have a penis.
Took me a while of frustrating failed drunken attempts before I realized I didn't have a penis.
Reply
kittenvks
| 11
51- it's just so unfair!!
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MrBrightside21
| 20
I'm a guy, but most of the time, I can't even find my penis.
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DrewFluIngle
| 10
Well that's a bad day or your penis has become retractable xD
By
Give_Linux_A_Go
| 28
Someone told me that works. It doesn't, it's a sham and quite frankly it's ridickulous.
Reply
slayer447
| 17
Your joke was bad and you should feel bad.
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retyi43
| 14
I found "ridickulous" quite amusing.
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himynameischeese
| 6
Lighten up! Let the man dream!
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Achall91
| 17
I didn't even realize the pun I just thought the guy was an idiot because he spelt ridiculous wrong.
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Give_Linux_A_Go
| 28
Yeesh, didn't see the -21 score coming. I almost certainly do feel bad. Apologies.
By
hblank
| 4
Yea, trust Linux. He knows.
By
sidewaysponytail
| 0
Well that sucks, but you did deserve it. But I'd hate to see how boring you are when you aren't stoned...honestly normal drunk stuff
Reply
Llamacod
| 11
dude you gotta lay off of the reefer, it says nothing about being stoned just drinking. I think you gotta quit reliving your own personal experiences of getting stoned and shampooing your dick to make it bigger
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sidewaysponytail
| 0
I kid he's probably a very nice interesting funny attractive person. Calllllmmmmmm doooowwwwwnnnnnnn:)
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AsianCookie247
| 14
40 - Mr ponytail's first comment was probably made while coming down from a high or withdrawals from lack of, and their second comment was most likely made once they took a couple hits from the bong. It's like a Before and After, they even included a smiley face to show how happy they are!
By
kirstyannemiller
| 4
Did it work? I mean all good things come at a price, right?
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TheEpicMilkMan
| 13
I'm pretty sure it didn't if he posted about it on fml...
By
11mandy80
| 6
I thought u were supposed to use soap
By
SkoomaKi
| 27
Size doesn't matter! Although at least your body hairs will be clean and silky smooth.
Reply
kyleekay
| 25
Size doesn't matter only if you know how to use what you've got.
Maybe poor OP is a bit lackluster in the love makin' department, and size is his only hope of redemption.
Not everyone can be natural-born sexperts like you, SkoomaKi.
Maybe poor OP is a bit lackluster in the love makin' department, and size is his only hope of redemption.
Not everyone can be natural-born sexperts like you, SkoomaKi.
Reply
SkoomaKi
| 27
Wait a minute. Saying "Size doesn't matter" makes me a sexpert? Brilliant! I must share my born ability with the world!
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TheEpicMilkMan
| 13
go ShooMaki run free with your new abilities!
By
IdfkMyUsernamexC
| 5
What on earth made you think that? Lol
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connerwonner
| 7
His friends probably told him that when he was drunk. Read between the lines.
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BumbleBug
| 0
he was drunk, maybe
By
jayhawkchik
| 4
Yeah, I saw it on Facebook.
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SystemofaBlink41
| 27
ANYTHING that's on facebook is true
Took me a while of frustrating failed drunken attempts before I realized I didn't have a penis.