By Anonymous - 03/06/2012 17:43 - Spain - Tordesillas

Today, I woke up after a night of partying and heavy drinking. Apparently word travels quickly, because everyone now knows that I spent hours lying in an empty bathtub, rubbing shampoo over my body with the expectation that it'd increase my penis size. FML
I agree, your life sucks 9 013
You deserved it 34 795

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Top comments

Wtf, you're supposed to use conditioner to do that. Duh

unknown_user5566 26

Oh, we've totally all been there. Took me a while of frustrating failed drunken attempts before I realized I didn't have a penis.


Wtf, you're supposed to use conditioner to do that. Duh

Damn_Hippster 11

Wait your telling me that DOESN'T increase my penis size??! All the those lonely nights rubbing shampoo on myself for nothing!!

Dr0reos 8

Really because ive had good results with head and shoulders shampoo

Trisha_aus 15

Hangover 3

JocelynKaulitz 28

You're supposed to use the shampoo that helps prevent dryness and add more volume…

Hahaha that funny


umm... There are about 7 things that points to YDI in this FML.

Inheritance 10

Question is OP did it work?

35 oh ya tell me about it, nothings worst than dry pubic hair. Gotta keep it moist.

You people are so off! The only shampoo that works for that is the one with the stallion logo. Never heard of the reference; hung like a horse? Yup.

Dude I thought it was soap

naw none of those products will work. But.. Smuckers will... unless thats too fancy for you.

GaleHawthorne 0

Ron Jeremy was wrong? ;(

Yep, think we've all been there.

Dr0reos 8

Yeah I once got really coked up on bath salts and bit off a hobos face by the side of the road.

Sorry for party rockin'!

unknown_user5566 26

Oh, we've totally all been there. Took me a while of frustrating failed drunken attempts before I realized I didn't have a penis.

kittenvks 11

51- it's just so unfair!!

MrBrightside21 20

I'm a guy, but most of the time, I can't even find my penis.

Well that's a bad day or your penis has become retractable xD

Someone told me that works. It doesn't, it's a sham and quite frankly it's ridickulous.

slayer447 17

Your joke was bad and you should feel bad.

I found "ridickulous" quite amusing.

himynameischeese 6

Lighten up! Let the man dream!

Achall91 17

I didn't even realize the pun I just thought the guy was an idiot because he spelt ridiculous wrong.

Yeesh, didn't see the -21 score coming. I almost certainly do feel bad. Apologies.

Yea, trust Linux. He knows.

sidewaysponytail 0

Well that sucks, but you did deserve it. But I'd hate to see how boring you are when you aren't stoned...honestly normal drunk stuff

Llamacod 11

dude you gotta lay off of the reefer, it says nothing about being stoned just drinking. I think you gotta quit reliving your own personal experiences of getting stoned and shampooing your dick to make it bigger

sidewaysponytail 0

I kid he's probably a very nice interesting funny attractive person. Calllllmmmmmm doooowwwwwnnnnnnn:)

AsianCookie247 14

40 - Mr ponytail's first comment was probably made while coming down from a high or withdrawals from lack of, and their second comment was most likely made once they took a couple hits from the bong. It's like a Before and After, they even included a smiley face to show how happy they are!

Did it work? I mean all good things come at a price, right?

TheEpicMilkMan 13

I'm pretty sure it didn't if he posted about it on fml...

I thought u were supposed to use soap

Size doesn't matter! Although at least your body hairs will be clean and silky smooth.

unknown_user5566 26

Size doesn't matter only if you know how to use what you've got. Maybe poor OP is a bit lackluster in the love makin' department, and size is his only hope of redemption. Not everyone can be natural-born sexperts like you, SkoomaKi.

Wait a minute. Saying "Size doesn't matter" makes me a sexpert? Brilliant! I must share my born ability with the world!

TheEpicMilkMan 13

go ShooMaki run free with your new abilities!

IdfkMyUsernamexC 5

What on earth made you think that? Lol

connerwonner 7

His friends probably told him that when he was drunk. Read between the lines.

he was drunk, maybe

jayhawkchik 4

Yeah, I saw it on Facebook.

SystemofaBlink41 27

ANYTHING that's on facebook is true