Today, I called my parents from out of state to see if they would order me a pizza using their credit card online because I'm out of money. I haven't lived with them for the past year, and they still claim me as a dependent on their taxes. They said no. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out that my parents are 28,000 dollars in debt and that my bank account has $27.17 in it. They took my money to help pay their debt. FML
Today, I found out why I haven't been getting my bank statements for the past couple of months. My parents have been hiding them from me, because they've been stealing from it. FML
Today, I finally got the nerve to tell my parents that I'm no longer going to pay them a flat percent of my salary, but only what they need to cover my expenses. Their response: "Better find a place of your own then, you freeloading bastard." FML
Today, my parents took me out to eat. When the bill came, they stared at me for a while before asking, “Aren’t you gonna pay?” They've never made me pay before, there was no indication that I’d have to pay this time, and I’d left my wallet at home. FML
Today, I lived at home rent free, until now. According to my mother, I receive "too many packages" from online shopping, and now I need to "chip in." FML
Today, I found out the only reason my parents want me to live with them is because of the tax refund. FML
Today, my parents threw a hissy fit calling me ungrateful and disrespectful for wanting to do laundry and clean at home, instead of going out to their friends' house for dinner. They also disconnected the Internet to punish me when they left. I'm 20 and visiting home on a college break. FML
Today, my parents said they were cutting me off for saving a kitten's life and wanting to keep it. I am 40 years-old and don't get any money from them. FML
Today, my parents, my two sisters and their significant others went on a vacation and dropped their children at my house without ever asking me. I'm single, live alone, and can barely make ends meet, and they know it. FML
Today, my parents have separated. I stayed with them, living at home far too long for my own comfort, just to help them keep it together after they lost their remaining parents. Literally the month after I moved out, they decided it wasn't worth it. I now suspect they stayed together only because I still lived at home. FML
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Top comments
zenti 2
If you're out of money, you should be asking your parents for money for groceries that will last a week or longer, not pizza that will only last a day and a half. How are you even managing to live on your own if you don't have any money, anyway? I don't really see the second to last sentence as being relevant; seems like you're just putting that there to say that your parents owe you.
SillyEars 0
you could always eat your limbs. masturbation can wait.
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Comments (72)
ImaginaryFoe 1
Déjà vu. I could swear I've read this FML and these comments before. Weird. OP, are you at university or something? If you have a different permanent address for more than 6 months out of the year, I don't think they can legally claim you unless they can provide proof of support. I think YDI because I'm guessing they are sponsoring you in some way (rent, school, etc.) and you are upset pizza isn't part of the deal. If you want to be treated like a grown-up, act like one.
FlashBurn 13
There's also a clause stating that if they make over a certain amount they can't be legally claimed either. I think it's $3200 or something like that. I can't remember, because I'm lucky enough to not have any dependants!
master0675 0
ur a dick
WallyTheWombat 0
Well if OP is begging them for pizza money then it seems OP is still dependent on them.
skittle68 0
Just because they can't "legally" claim him, doesn't mean they aren't going to do so anyway. My parents claimed me for as long as they could, even after I moved out.
stevenmx86 8
Get a job..
blinks 0
put simply: I asked my parents for a pizza and they said no. woe is me, fml etc etc you've probably been demanding handouts from them your whole life and they've decided enough is enough. it's time to take care of yourself for once toots.
W4X 0
Work at the Pizza Place if they are hiring? Free pizza. :P
my_two_cents 3
You haven't lived with them for over a year, you should be able to take care of yourself. Grow up.
Av8solo 0
So far away and STILL a mooch... Try living within your means.
philzilla 1
you should move back in with your parents since you can't take care of yourself
closetaltruist 2
If you are really broke, you shouldn't be ordering pizza. Thats how you run out of money. YTDI.
iloveboyswittats 10
maybe OP lives in a dorm or something and can't really do much cooking. Anyway, doesn't the word dependent imply that he depends on them for the things he needs, like food?
texan4life 0
well you are dependent on them if your asking them for money
LtChicken 0
I'm outta money too! guess what I'm doing? NOT EATING PIZZA. YDI. try learning to cook. eggs, potatos and rice are cheeeap.