Today, I brought my boyfriend over to meet my parents. They prepared dinner for us - mushroom pasta. I have always hated mushrooms, so I spent the entire dinner trying not to gag. Unfortunately, I did gag and my mom got up and smacked me so hard I fell out of my chair. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming, "What the fuck?!" FML
Today, I was invited to my boyfriend's house for dinner for the first time. His mom made a fantastic dinner, so I showed my appreciation by eating the lot. Apparently I was overdoing it because when I looked up everyone was staring. His dad muttered, "Slow the hell down." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML
Today, my idiot boyfriend, who thinks he's an outdoorsman, made sauce from mushrooms he'd foraged. I refused to eat it. He got upset and had two helpings. He's now in bed, whining about how bad he feels. Stupid dumbass. FML
Today, I was out to dinner with my boyfriend and his parents. It was my first time meeting them, so I was a bit nervous. As we were talking, I accidentally let out a loud burp. His parents looked at me in shock, and my boyfriend just laughed and said, "Well, she's certainly comfortable around you two." FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML
Today, my parents finally invited my boyfriend over for dinner. Everything was going great until my mother asked him his profession. He stuffed his mouth full of lasagna, snorted, and then responded, "I clean shit for a living." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML
Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef was throwing food at us, I was getting ready for my turn. He tossed a piece of broccoli at me, I leaned back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Your mother is a wonderful parent. Who hits their kid over something like that? Also, mushrooms are horrible, so you were justified in your retching.
ojosRojos 28
At least it wasn’t HIS parents and you didn’t have to impress them? But yeah, that sucks.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (38)
Taurus_ChicKa 37
At first, I thought you meant your mom smacked you on the back like you were choking on the mushroom (which she shouldn't have made knowing you hate them). But now I'm wondering if that's the case... yikes! Sorry, OP. FYL indeed.
hkittyfreak 4
your mother is a sociopath
Sinshine 28
Give your mom a ticket for a stay at the psych ward for Christmas.
Edessa 8
Well I guess that's one way to react
TumblrweedPasses 11
She HIT you that hard for that?? Maybe drop mama messed up out the picture till she's back on the meds
Casstrodamus 4
The smack was completely uncalled for, but to be honest, I don't get why you gagged. I dislike mushrooms quite a bit (except chanterelles cooked in bacon fat with onions and green peppers, because they take on the taste and texture of meat), and they've never made me gag.