Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML
Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML
Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML
Today, I broke up with my psycho girlfriend of one month. She actually expected me to let her keep the vintage car that I've been rebuilding for the past two years, and when I refused, she threatened to burn my garage down with us still in it. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend in a crowded mall. I thought this was a good idea, until she went ballistic, began screaming and crying, and then stabbed me in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. I got banned from the mall. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
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Top comments
vrossie_ 15
Can't you call then cops for that? ..
123amanda123 14
the poor hamster! :(
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Comments (297)
sidious_fml 16
NOOOOOOO!!!! NONONONONO THE HAMSTER OMG NOOOOO :'((
Casseopeia 21
That is so cruel ;(
kumarina 35
Call the police, sue her ass!!!!
keerththana 13
Wtf, poor hamster :( dnt let her get away, better do somethin' abt it.
Ziggy122 15
NO! NOT THE HAMSTER!!!! But seriously. Holy shit, dude, press charges! Restraining order!
Dusty_Busters 15
Oh my god that is some serial killer shit, watch out dude
dizzaymizlizzay 11
Jesus ****! Get a restraining order, and seriously file a police report on the breaking and entering, and damage to property (since that's all pets are considered)
koolhaddi 1
What. the. fork.
SavannahSunshine 26
It's good you got out when you did! Someday that hamster could have been you...
Twigz 4
my jaw literally dropped from reading this. calls the cops, op!