Kids: Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he... - FML

By cahsecuel - 14/08/2014 20:44 - France - Grisolles

Spicy

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 638

You deserved it 7 131

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

Oversharing

By Anonymous - 13/03/2020 12:30

Spicy

Today, my 10-year-old son told me that sometimes he wishes that he could be a girl, so that he could masturbate more easily in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 865

You deserved it 266

By Anonymous - 26/09/2014 21:07 - United States - Pensacola

Spicy

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 194

You deserved it 8 199

By Anonymous - 22/03/2016 21:17 - United States - Fremont

Today, my son's teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He put down "unemployed". FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 113

You deserved it 2 086

Sex work is work

By Anonymous - 02/01/2016 22:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 247

You deserved it 29 562

Bad influence

By Anonymous - 22/01/2015 18:27 - United States - Katy

Today, my in-laws were visiting. My mother-in-law asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He said "A pimp!" I have no idea where he even heard the word, but the death glares my in-laws gave me made me want to shrivel up and die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 277

You deserved it 3 181

By PlayboyBunny - 19/02/2011 07:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 616

You deserved it 8 636

By Bad parenting101 - 08/01/2017 03:23 - United States - Denver

Spicy

Today, my son shaved his eyebrows. Two days ago, I caught my 10-year-old daughter watching porn. I'm totally winning at parenting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 843

You deserved it 2 255

By anonymousyo - 24/04/2015 22:04 - United States - Vacaville

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 146

You deserved it 4 226

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

By helen_ - 23/04/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I had to go to my 10 year-old son's school to talk about my job being a chef. As I was almost finished, I asked the kids "What would you like to do when you grow up?" Without hesitation one kid replied with a straight face, "Anything but being a douchebag like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 516

You deserved it 6 056

By sorry, kiddo - 30/06/2013 21:44 - Belgium - Brussels

Spicy

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 454

You deserved it 10 179

Next

Top comments

Aspen_Grace33 27

Friday 15 August 2014 5:04

You always told him he could be anything he wanted when he grew up!!! Just a little concerned he is striving to be the next Ron Jeremy before his voice has even changed!!!

monstermatt001 13

Friday 15 August 2014 5:05

He's going to have a "hard time" with that! ;)

Comments

Ali3Z3bra 8

Friday 15 August 2014 12:41

haha

Tegosauras 1

Friday 15 August 2014 13:04

You would be from France...

dkelly_6 13

Friday 15 August 2014 13:12

Maybe he said pawnstar ;)

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 15 August 2014 13:53

He had to cüm up with a decision on what to do with his life, and it CAME to him.

NotDarkKnight 27

Friday 15 August 2014 13:59

This kid knows what's up.

MisterGasMoney 16

Friday 15 August 2014 14:17

You're gonna go far, kid.

junior562 1

Friday 15 August 2014 14:32

atleast he knows what he wants

vlalam 24

Friday 15 August 2014 14:34

lol, he knows what he wants.. he is going places baby ;)

CrysisKing 5

Friday 15 August 2014 15:07

Nice!

pbull 5

Friday 15 August 2014 15:23

Hey at least he has a goal! Lol

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The Top

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I have no sex drive, but faked it to avoid hurting his feelings. It was after he confessed he is not attracted to women, but forced himself to have sex with me because he didn't want to admit he is gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 202

You deserved it 3 628

Today, I set aside a weekend to spend time with a friend. I learned that someone else is staying there: a fat, unemployed man-child who talks shit about us on Facebook, while his manipulative wife pays his bills. He got evicted from his last home when he pretended to be a ninja and cut up his neighbor's garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 64

The Top

Today, I took a pretty nasty fall on the ice and made noises similar to the ones my dad makes when he's in pain. I am officially becoming old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 138

Today, it's my first wedding anniversary, or Paper anniversary. I got him airline tickets for an expensive weekend break for two in Berlin. He got me a toilet roll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 360

You deserved it 5 006

Today, my long distance girlfriend finally responded to me, after a week of silence. Unfortunately, the response was to block me. I'm pretty sure she has found someone else, but doesn't want to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 119

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 317

You deserved it 6 044

Today, I came early from my job, just to find my boyfriend in bed, with my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 097

You deserved it 105

Today, my work made us all get up at 3 a.m. to head to the airport for our 7 a.m. flight, only for us to get to the airport and find out the flight is cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976

You deserved it 88