Today, I actually heard my 14 year-old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I let my 19-year-old son drive my Lexus to his date. At 11:00 p.m., I watched him pull into the driveway with a broken taillight, marks and scratches all over the car, the front bumper missing, and him being nearly passed out because he's so drunk. FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son was waiting in the car for me after driving around to build up hours for his permit. He then decided it was a good idea to quickly drive over to catch a Pokemon nearby. He didn't count on getting pulled over for texting and driving while underage without an adult though. FML
Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML
Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML
Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML
Today, I picked up my idiot 20 year-old son from a party. He was shit-faced drunk and managed to drop his vape out the window as I was driving. He tried to open the door of the moving car to get out and look for it, and I had to grab him and pull him back in. Legally, this moron is an adult. FML
Today, I had to bail my son out of jail, because he's a wimp and wouldn't last a night in there. His crime: pissing through the open windows of passing cars after losing a bet with his friends. I feel like if he gave me grandkids, they'd be born with half a brain. FML
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML
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Top comments
docscientist 10
The influence of things on stupid people.
Cmliedtke 0
just about every teenager I know has been playing M games since they were like 10... I guarantee you 85% of all Call of Duty players are below 18..-_-
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Comments (274)
Hockeyboy4280 18
Your son is my new hero.
christian50 0
Nothing like porking a hooker then shooting her afterwards to get your money back. That's how society should be.
zman1422 3
well if I get hit by a drunk fourteen year old who says he was able to drive drunk in gta then I'll know who to call.
every1luvsvag 10
Wait, since when is drunk driving bad?
johnnie254 7
ummm isn't it rated 18+?
theSil 0
Well to late to mold that mind, good luck
jupiter80 0
137- God only killed the world once asshole, because sin killed the world
codyfaber 0
it is actually pretty hard in the game
Hockeyboy4280 18
Yeah no kidding. Sudden swerves, cops coming at you, not to mention it takes what seems like FOREVER to sober up in a hot pursuit...
Hockeyboy4280 18
Yeah no kidding. Sudden swerves, cops coming at you, not to mention it takes what seems like FOREVER to sober up in a hot pursuit...
Tarak_fml 7
parenting FAIL
Dugan360 3
Holy poop i think i know this kid