Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, I taught my 18 month-old daughter to wipe the green, snotty mucus from under her nose with a tissue. To which, like a ninja, she then wiped my open-mouthed upper lip with that same snotty tissue. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 7-year-old son that it's not okay to smell others' "wieners". FML
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML
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Top comments
ApollosMyth 22
Well, I hope it was snot too hard to explain.
KylieMangion 22
I cannot believe why a grown man would do that to his own baby O.O
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Comments (99)
Inked0803 12
And you reproduced with this man? Good choice
rt156 16
That is disgusting,ur husband is disgusting
cloco_fml 5
Is your husband retarded?
marcranger 28
If my reading of STFU, Parents is any indication, that's nowhere near the worst of what's going to wind up in the kid's hair. Good luck, OP!
mansen 15
"Hey honey can you get me a tissu...aaaaachooo!"...*sneezes onto babys head, finishes up by wiping nose on babys hair. "Nevermind! Hey! Did you know that the kids hair is totally soft and absorbant??".
shanannygians07 28
Well at least you taught your husband not to wipe them on the walls or his own clothes
xredlips14x 2
well that's pretty discusting #andigoderpderpderp
TogeBara 12
why are you doing hashtags on this site? It isn't twitter ya twit -.- you seem to have about the same IQ as the father in this FML on a side note, why did you reproduce with this...?
BobbieH 19
Seriously, who does that? What possesses someone to even think of something like wiping their boogers into a child's hair? The whole thing just boggles my mind! I think your husband needs to spend some time reading Ms. Manners!
Bluekaren16 19
Clever people would definitely not do that.
LilFlutter 10
If only you hadn't named your baby "Kleenex"!