By deadman - 09/07/2012 18:25 - United Kingdom - Market Harborough

Today, I'm having heart surgery. The doc came in, donut in one hand and papers in another. While I was filling them out, his hands kept trembling, and he dropped the donut on the floor. He fumbled to pick it up and kept eating. The guy I'm entrusting my life to doesn't even respect the five-second rule. FML
I agree, your life sucks 30 370
You deserved it 2 472

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thundergirl_fml 2

I'd be more concerned about his trembling hands considering you're having heart surgery...


thundergirl_fml 2

I'd be more concerned about his trembling hands considering you're having heart surgery...

Don't worry you probably already have a donut in your heart by the time you read this

MrBrightside21 20

Wow. It seems like you don't even care about OP having heart surgery. Have a heart, #22.

Am I the only one wondering what heart sugery is?

hockeyoceancity 13

70- Don't be such a grammar nazi... You know what it was meant to say.

Umm.. Why are you on FML when you're getting heart surgery? Just wondering

MagicGiraffe 12

He probably is just the leader of the operation and may not even lay a finger on you.

In my experience, many older cardiac surgeons have a familial tremor... The heart really isn't as delicate as many people think. I have seen some impressive tremors, but have yet to see an operation turn out badly because of them.

dont be too stressed about the tremour. I work with doctors & they are some of THE best surgeons. Im sorry to hear you are having/had heart surgery. best of luck!

How does that help OP? They're not his surgeons.

It takes around thirty seconds for any bacteria to transfer. Chill.

Trix_Disorder 20

Actually, it takes less than a second. Anyone who's taken a Biology course (or has common sense) would know that. The five second rule is baloney.

boycrazy30007 12

Totally agree. Bacteria transfers instantaneously. In thirty seconds it would have spread over the entire donut and more

10- not quite but it's true that the 5 second rule is very misleading.

You realize that any bacteria that would "transfer" to the doughnut would already be on you anyway because you touch the floor every second? So, isn't this debate quite pointless?

hotforkegger 4

not unless you walk around on all fours.

Dumby the OP doesnt care for the donut trembling hands mean theres might be some mistakes.

TheBean27 3

You have to be incredibly stupid to believe that, bacteria is transferred the second it touvhes the ground.

They tried this on Mythbusters. And concluded that Bacteria transfers on contact, and multiply with rapid rate.

But we breath bacteria and germs in the air so our immune system should protect us.

I saw a show that said dropping moist ingredients bacteria transfers in under 1 second, dry ingredients three and under. Not sure how correct but what if it was a tim tam!

You need to retake Highschool biology my friend

I think this reply chain lowered my IQ by a few points, damn morons.

The 5-second rule is a myth and nothing more. Bacteria transfer on contact. Full stop. johngaltmovement - The bacteria in your mouth are different than the ones on the floor that can make you sick. You do have gut immunity (google "secretory IgA") which protects you somewhat, but not against everything.

They did research recently and found out the dangerous ones which your body cant fight against takes around 5 seconds so it is true in some sense

Not true, bacteria can transfer the... (cant fond a fraction of a second long enough...) as soon as the doughnut hit the ground. :D

yeah and Mythbusters proved it, for all you non biology people

22cute 17

True transfer is instantaneous and true bacteria is everywhere. But a hearty immune system is improved by the occasional bacteria challenge. :) Eat it anyway!

119 Yes, how convenient for us that the deadly bacteria are also the physically handicapped bacteria.

Yeah, imagine this: Bacteria 1: "Don´t hop on that bagel, it has not been on the ground for 5 seconds, yet!" Bacteria 2: "Yeah, sure. I´ll wait 2 seconds..."

I doubt it is the same doctor. The hands would worry me more. Floors at docs office are clean. Lol

aleeshttylXD 9

what did floors being clean have to do with anything?

Actually the floors at doctor's offices are NOT clean. They are covered with germs and bacteria and who knows what else! Gross!

medical facility floors are likely more dangerously dirty due to the disproportionate number of seriously ill people that are on them... Bacteria and viruses don't crawl onto dropped food, they are transferred immediately upon contact... , not 30 seconds or even 5 seconds, instantly

OhDearBetrayal 25

Maybe he's doing it on purpose because he finds enjoyment in other peoples fears?

blcksocks 19

Yeah, because scaring the crap out of someone who already has a weak heart is a very wise thing for a doc to do right?

bkj92 5

Reminds me something that House would do off the TV show lmao

Mademoiselle_fml 34

I actually wouldn't be surprised; some people have a very sick sense of humor...

Watch out for Junior Mints during the operation. I don't know how many will get that seinfeld reference :

6- I think you forgot half of the happy face at the end of your comment. :)

It was a : face but yeah, the 20% warning popped up as i went to hit send. Im surprizsed i did that well trying to type on an ipod

Wow the mouth didnt show up again, its not me its the ipod sabotaging me

First, they will eliminate our parenthesis, then the human race.

Revenge of the apple products RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!

perdix 29

Count me in that number, except I never knew why that surgeon was also the Assman. I didn't think proctologists did surgery.

Get a new doctor. Don't let someone operate on you that you don't trust.

Since when there is a "five second rule" ,IT'S A HOSPITAL!!

thiscrazything 1

Exactly, filled with sick people and germs like staff and MRSA.

kut17 11

*drops scalpel, blows off germs*

Drops heart, oops five second rule. Blows off the dirt and tries to wipe off the hairs. Eh, whatever, *puts it back.*

perdix 29

A heart surgeon that eats donuts at work, has trembling hands and eats shit off the floor? You'd be better off using happy thoughts or acupuncture to fix your bad ticker than having this clown crack you open.

Trisha_aus 15

DocBastard doesn't like doughnuts..does he?

perdix 29

It's not just that the doctor likes donuts -- it's just the sheer bad taste of eating them in front of a patient who likely is there because of eating too many donuts.

jellycorn 13

Wonder how well the happy thoughts remedy will work?

LOL. I usually hate those cop jokes, but that one was pretty good. xP