Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, I taught my 18 month-old daughter to wipe the green, snotty mucus from under her nose with a tissue. To which, like a ninja, she then wiped my open-mouthed upper lip with that same snotty tissue. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 7-year-old son that it's not okay to smell others' "wieners". FML
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML
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Top comments
ApollosMyth 22
Well, I hope it was snot too hard to explain.
KylieMangion 22
I cannot believe why a grown man would do that to his own baby O.O
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Comments (99)
dukie420 4
Neither are you!
simoncat 11
Oh boy! And you chose the procreate with this one. Yippee for us; society. Sorry,OP. that was mean. I apologize. You're not the bad guy, the idiot you bred with is.
emirie 21
That's a little harsh.
Sk8in 1
He is what kids call the boogey monster...if that makes sense
Omniprism 14
Gross. Wtf is his problem? On the bright side your baby's immune system is going to be great.
MichaelArvizu 1
This reminds me of Family Guy where Peter does this to Meg haha
caircair 3
I pray the child has the OP's brains - daddy certainly doesn't seem to have any!
hickfromthestick 5
where do you want him to wipe them.
teacupofsunshine 29
This made me mad,people are crying for a kid and your idiot husband uses his kid as a tissue . I'd be pissed if I was in your shoe!