Today, feeling angry at the world, I threw a bottle, that had been clearly marked to be recycled, into a garbage can as an act of defiance. Minutes later, I guiltily retreated and spent the next few minutes with my entire arm stuck up the stinking ass of a city garbage can. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Hoarders
Today, my wife can barely contain her rage at me for throwing out her collection of unique glass bottles, which she was saving for gifting and decoration. I'd feel more guilt if she hadn't been storing them in a box underneath our sink mixed with recyclables. FML
Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML
Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML
It's not Mondays you hate, it's capitalism
Today, I was accosted by an angry homeless man at the recycling center, since I refused to give him my saved up bottles and cans. He insisted that he needed it more and I was "poaching his turf". I needed the recycling to put gas in my car, just to make it to work and hope I could make it back home. FML
Trashed
Today, I had to take out the trash at work and I kept trying to throw it in the dumpster. After five tries I finally made it in. I was feeling pretty good since the bag was heavy. That was until I turned around and saw about 30 of my coworkers applauding and laughing at me. FML
Today, it's garbage day. My mom accidentally threw away a receipt she needed to return something and told me to go get it. While I was looking for it, a cop gave me hell for "stealing recyclables on private property." This all happened in my front lawn. FML
Today, at 4:00 a.m., I woke up and realized that I had thrown an expensive gift certificate for a friend in the garbage. Since it was garbage day, I ran out in the rain in my pajamas and rifled through all three bags of garbage. Twice. I found the gift certificate. It was in my pocket. FML
Anger management
Today, I drove a different work vehicle, one with the cupholder right behind the gear lever. After multiple accidental attempts at changing gears with my Coke bottle, I threw it out the window in a temper. I then got busted for littering. FML
Today, I went to drop the garbage in the compactor as I left to do some shopping. I quickly put my handbag down on the side, threw the 'garbage' in the machine, watched it do its thing, and then turned round to find... the bag of garbage on the side. FML
Eco friendly
Today, I was on a walk when I saw a man dump a bag of trash into the creek. Furious, I shouted at him, and when he shoved me, I threw him into the creek. Later, I was arrested and charged with battery. FML
Top comments
P374RD3D 9
Watch out, we got a badass over here.
SeahorseGuy 7
I like the environment and would normally applaud what you did (I do applaud what you did, good job), but I'd never do that.
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Comments (129)
Feverrotes 15
Neither FML or YDI. OP should be applauded for making amends.
Greendaycheese 12
Way to show society, OP..
Feverrotes 15
OP should be applauded for making amends.
Dekarian 7
All trash is sorted at the garbage collection facility anyway. Sorting it yourself only saves them a step. Unless you're taking it to the recycling facility yourself, separating trash and recyclables is pointless.
doodlecloud 27
You literally just said it 'saves them a step'. Then you said 'it's pointless'. Do you see where you've gone wrong?
l0v3p4in 7
22 - Have you ever rode with a trashman? The other day I did and guess what? Trash is not sorted at all. I even witnessed a couple trashmen taking the recycle boxes [which were located right beside the Herbie Curbies] and dump all those recyclables into the dump truck. Once we arrived at the landfill it was no diiferent. Garbage men are not going to take all day to sort through tons of used tampons, baby diapers, decomposing food waste, and other such trash. They dump it all into a landfill. Please, get your facts straight before posting such things.
Dekarian 7
80 - You're quite right, the garbage men never sort the garbage. It's the workers at the sorting facility at which all the trash trucks empty their load that sort the trash. What you call "the landfill" was actually the drop-off area at the facility. Please, get your facts straight before posting such things.
tiernang 21
THERES NO SUCH THING AS A ******* SORTING FACILITY
AbstraktThoughts 13
Watch out, we got a badass over here.
off_constantly 8
Nice attempt at trying not to conform to society. Every new thing starts off in baby steps so I recommend attempting to jay walk next time.
HeyArnold91 8
Considering some people take their anger out in more destructive ways, I can't judge you too much...... However YDI
IchimaruGin 5
I doubt that bottle would make it to recycling, even so.
MsPurpleDonkey 2
Watch out we've got a badass over here
Boob_fml 6
This is the third comment that says this. WHY?!
desireev 18
It's funny... This looks exactly like #8's comment... Way to be original, champ.
MsPurpleDonkey 2
Why thank you for the compliment
DocBastard 40
Throwing a bottle in the GARBAGE? Holy shit man, calm yourself or else this rash and dangerous activity may continue! What's next, something REALLY crazy like eating trans fat? Taking the high occupancy lane while only you are in the car? Not saying "bless you" to someone who sneezes?? Are you mad?! Imagine the consequences!!
desireev 18
Where's an officer when you need them? ;D
Argumental_Rhino 8
Everyone knows that not recycling is a gateway crime. Next it will be murder and robbery
iTsbSkuLLy 8
I agree this guy is definitely a menace to society. Wonder how much time he will spend in the pin.