Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
Pervy perv walks
Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, as I was cashing a customer out, he stopped me in the middle of the transaction just to tell me that the condoms he was buying are too big for him. FML
Tip off
Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML
Today, I was cashiering at Target when an old woman came into my checkout line. Her items? Variety pack of pleasuring condoms, a bottle of KY sensual lube, and two colorful thongs. As I'm scanning these, she leans in and whispers, "I love toys." FML
Running commentary
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
Misunderstood
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms. I couldn't find them anywhere, so I nervously asked a staff member for help. She scowled, pointed at the shelf directly behind me, and told me to, "Get a life. Or better pick-up lines." I'll never live down the snickers from the other customers. FML
Cheeky!
Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML
Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML
Top comments
boopityboppity 11
Ah, the joys of being a cashier. Some of the people are just so strange. This one person — not entirely unlike the OP's — came through my line with one pregnancy test and a single coat hanger. I hope it was a practical joke or something, in both of our cases.
MrBoredGuy 1
crazy old men and their sexual needs, surprised he only got one can
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Comments (102)
Jose124 0
Woah
ilikeemsmall 4
I love how young people these days act like they are the only ones that should be having sex. If realizing that old people still have sex is going to "scar you for life" then get a job after you grow up.
Quagmire69 5
That is ironic. Last night when I was in Canada I bought a box of rubbers and whipped cream from a frigid looking cashier.
jesss3113 0
@ 91 ... i should grow up? I really dont care what the 80 someing year old guy was buying, or what he does in the privacy of his own home, its just the fact that he was giving a 17 year old a really creepy smile, especially considering his purchase.
Moo_Horse 0
ha oh Canada, first Justin Beiber now Old Creepy Guy
someguy314159265 15
Actually, to be honest, I think it's a step up from Justin Bieber. It's now on the old creepy guy level, and not on the old creepy guy disguised as a 16 year old girl level.
cutlasson24s 0
wow so just cause he was trying to get his **** on yu got creeped out? seems like yur very lonely n need a dick
dabeatbaby 0
you sir are a perv. 50$$$ your gay.
chacegrr 0
Maybe he was getting ready for his lemon party ;).
randombitches1 0
one question..... IS HE RICH??????????????
myselfami 1
Oh you poor, poor woman. On a side note, you just reminded me of my elderly (in their 80s) neighbors talking about their shower having a massage setting, with similar grins to what you described...