Miscellaneous: Today, as I was waiting in line at the check out, some guy came... - FML

By Anonymous - 09/11/2014 18:49 - United States - Springfield

Today, as I was waiting in line at the check out, some guy came up behind me, plucked a hair out of my head, and ran off with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 419

You deserved it 2 981

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Same thing different taste

By LittleGina - 04/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Benson

Today, a woman was standing in front of me in line. There was a strand of hair on her back, so to be nice, I pulled it off her. It was still attached to her head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 556

You deserved it 7 780

How're you doing?

By figcurzyez - 23/05/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, the checkout guy at my local store asked me if I had my hair cut. I answered and started talking about my hair, and he gave me a really weird look. He was talking to his friend, who I hadn't noticed in the queue behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 016

You deserved it 2 332

By littlekellilee - 08/03/2012 16:23 - Canada

Today, I was in class and felt something tugging on my hair. I thought it was caught on the chair, so I turned around a little to look. The guy behind me was holding my hair and smelling it. He gave me a creepy smile, winked, and continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 877

You deserved it 2 541

By notmine - 20/04/2014 02:39 - India - New Delhi

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 713

You deserved it 3 541

By Anonymous - 10/12/2010 21:59 - New Zealand

Today, my dad came up behind me with a pair of scissors, and pretended to snip away at my hair. I was sure he was joking, so I just sat there and didn't react. Later, I felt the back of my head and looked at my hand. Suffice it to say, I now have a large bald patch on the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 193

You deserved it 6 711

By frustrated - 11/07/2013 04:52 - United States - Antioch

Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 821

You deserved it 3 581

By Gitana - 22/04/2012 19:08 - Spain - Tafalla

Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 890

You deserved it 3 166

By coop42 - 15/01/2014 19:22 - United States - Hortonville

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 104

You deserved it 6 076

By therundown - 20/07/2011 13:38 - United States

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 605

You deserved it 3 978

By robbedonCTA - 22/09/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 103

You deserved it 7 695

Next

Top comments

DeuceDeuce 16

Monday 10 November 2014 9:31

Polyjuice potion?

baxeh 29

Monday 10 November 2014 9:33

Ever seen someone so attractive you just had to try to clone them?

Comments

schober60 13

Wednesday 12 November 2014 2:02

Commit any federal crimes lately?haha maybe it was PI getting a DNA sample

jeanyrios 10

Wednesday 12 November 2014 20:52

I would have ran out after the creeper

kutkutkut 8

Thursday 13 November 2014 5:37

Don't be suprised if you see a clone of you in the street real soon, like 10 of them :O

Morgansmom1118 0

Thursday 13 November 2014 21:44

No that isn't creepy not at all...omg lol

YouDontNomie 9

Friday 14 November 2014 17:21

He's a wizard!

fmlrulesBolt 14

Friday 14 November 2014 19:21

For DNA purposes? Still, that's weird.

samboodeee 4

Saturday 15 November 2014 11:21

Ok i might be downvoted for this but i usually laugh always about everything because for me not one thing is worth killing yourself like some people did i first thought of polyjuice potion (ok i wrote that wrong i know) and laughed and i would let stuff like that go because 10/10 of the people here on earth die so why takin life that serious? Why so worried? Just have fun no one will ever remember that any way haha

ihelent 10

Monday 17 November 2014 0:46

He's going to leave it at a crime scene

Kerix_FML 10

Monday 17 November 2014 20:50

Witch Craft !!!!!

TacoloverSWE 23

Monday 17 November 2014 21:44

He's gonna use it to scan your DNA and do scientific experiments on it.

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 017

You deserved it 3 407

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 005

You deserved it 21 832

The Top

Today, I called my dad to ask why my university tuition had not been paid. He said that my school was "too expensive" and he "couldn't afford it." He then asked me if I would take in his mail while he was away. He was taking his new wife to Hawaii; apparently it's beautiful this time of year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 596

You deserved it 3 612

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 973

You deserved it 8 324

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 190

You deserved it 9 396

Today, I was at a stoplight when a guy rear-ended me going 40mph due to texting and driving. The lady in front of me ended up getting bumped by my car, totaling my car and leaving a scratch on her bumper. She refused to call an ambulance. I ended up with a mild concussion and sprained neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 450

You deserved it 614

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 683

You deserved it 19 928

Today, on a first date, he told me I look like his ex's mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 235

You deserved it 949