Love: Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I...

By ouchmyeye - 10/06/2011 04:59 - United States

Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 695

You deserved it 5 122

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Vero - 17/05/2012 15:02 - Austria - Timelkam

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 350

You deserved it 3 527

By Anonymous - 05/08/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 544

You deserved it 4 552

By Kaz - 07/05/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 582

You deserved it 50 269

By Jacqueline - 01/07/2012 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 224

You deserved it 4 790

By anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 404

You deserved it 4 468

By Faaccckkk - 25/03/2013 14:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 966

You deserved it 3 332

By me - 27/10/2010 12:36 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 217

You deserved it 5 729

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 15/07/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 733

By staciedee - 01/06/2010 09:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 166

You deserved it 4 949

Rude awakening

By oww - 15/11/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 247

You deserved it 3 394

Tsunami87 17

Friday 10 June 2011 12:14

don't we use mobile phones these days?

Temi25 6

Friday 10 June 2011 12:13

at least he wants to see you

Comments

brmgirl123 0

Friday 10 June 2011 18:00

how romanticc!

Offensive_fml 4

Friday 10 June 2011 19:07

Suck it up. I was hit with a chalk 0.5 a CM away from my cornea, and it wasn't painful beside the uncontrollable tearing.

Freeze_fml 16

Friday 10 June 2011 19:20

Cool story bro.

EmoFinn 0

Friday 10 June 2011 19:23

Tell it again.

andrester 0

Friday 10 June 2011 19:59

why was your window open?

Just_Peed 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 19:29

oh yeah that's weird..cause she opened it?-.-

rjflores 0

Friday 10 June 2011 20:05

mission accomplished.

Vonneil 0

Friday 10 June 2011 20:06

What a dumbass

dani__rawrr 0

Friday 10 June 2011 20:29

NCTM n qz

fitted5 0

Friday 10 June 2011 20:54

how about a txt that would of worked

JokerJohn7 0

Friday 10 June 2011 21:18

Romeo and Juliet gone wrong

crzy4life 0

Friday 10 June 2011 21:25

lol that's funny

JERZBornNRaised 7

Friday 10 June 2011 23:47

ohhh god damn... ayyy baby nuthin says i love you more than a rock to the face! tell your dad he beat you, that'll get him back hehe

Keywords

Animals Cats Cute Awkward Family Intimacy Sex Alcohol Coworkers Work Health Psychology Mental health Relationship advice Weird Love AITA Miscellaneous Neighbours Cops Stressed out Parents Scary Birthday Dogs Cake Cars Embarrassing Transportation Cooking

The Top

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 859

You deserved it 6 043

Today, I've been sexting a mysterious guy from New Jersey. I was getting hot, so I decided to say, "I want you to be my first." Suddenly, my officemate who was two desks away from me waved her phone in hand and shouted, "You're a virgin?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 696

You deserved it 676

The Top

Today, I found out that my estranged daughter has been married for five years. I wasn't told of or invited to their wedding, and the only reason I know now is because she needs money for a divorce lawyer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 164

You deserved it 4 825

Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 952

You deserved it 5 039

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 664

You deserved it 31 431

Today, a friend pointed out to me that I bear a striking resemblance to Anne Frank. I'm a 16-year-old guy, and I'm inclined to agree with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 483

You deserved it 829

Today, at work, there was a police officer waiting for me. Bewildered, I asked what the problem was. Someone had shot fireworks at cars in the parking lot and I was a suspect. Why? Ponytails on men apparently look suspicious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 212

You deserved it 18 525

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 607

You deserved it 43 826

Same thing different taste

Not a morning person

Rude awakening

Top comments

Comments