By MIND BLOWING - 20/10/2012 13:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 233
You deserved it 39 734

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I thought you were gonna say you contracted herpes . So LUCKY you ! ^.^


At least you made sure that where you were going was clean.

Trisha_aus 15

Could be a women. If it's sex/genitalia people assume it's a male, if it's relationship/child people assume it's female.

Inheritance 10

Hand sanitizer in the penis hole.. *shutter*

Only takes .01% of germs to get you sick

Inheritance 10

37 thank you didn't realize my mistake my apologizes.

Inheritance 10

I blame that one on autocorrect.. Haha

SenselessPattern 12

36 - Even when talking about women, it's still "penis hole", not whatever a '******' is.

Inheritance 10
flipfloperson 5

50- It is entirely possible that he was referring to the external urethral orifice, not a ******.

Gotta say, this would probably unpleasant on a dick, but it's gotta be hell for the person who got hand sanitizer in their vagoo or butt.

oj101 33

AIDS is a virus, not a germ....

Hand sanitizer? wow, that must've really made her scream. LOL

73- all single celled pathogens are considered 'germs'... including viruses.

Llamacod 11

# 30, I'm pretty damn sure that it couldn't possibly be "a women"

MagicGiraffe 12

78, not to be too nerdy but technically viruses are not cells, neither are they living. They are not bacteria but the term "germ" is used loosely, but I wouldn't use it with STD at all...

I wonder if OP is a gay male, the gay scene is pretty big in Ontario.


Lol seeing the bright side of things...

I thought you were gonna say you contracted herpes . So LUCKY you ! ^.^

It's good to practice Safe sex..killing germs and what not.

flutter4 7

As a lady, I don't even want to know how badly that would feel going inside of my vajayjay. And I feel equally bad for dude. But I've always wondered what the .1% of germs aren't covered. Maybe we will finally learn what that are!

Revan501 15

Hey at least you had some protection.

winnerme123 8

For all you know it could be a form of spermicide.

Ya the burning sensation means it working OP.

The last time someone on FML used sanitizer as lube, they had to wear an adult diaper for a week...

Well at least it is clean, your privates are now 99.9% bacteria free.

But not totally baby free.. Check back in 9 months

Don't be surprised if the baby turns out to be a bleach blonde.

Alcohol up the ass sounds very painful :o.

perdix 29

At least you won't get any bacterial infections. Viruses and pregnancy are still possible, perhaps even likely.

I feel like it would hurt her more than you

OP could be a girl... (And don't say you meant OP could be a lesbian, because I don't think that's what you meant. :P )

BellaBelle_fml 23

saksxalmo; You're right, no one knows OP's gender. It wasn't specified. So that leaves us little choice but to speculate their gender. Some people may say the OP is a girl, and others may say the OP is a guy. But no one knows for sure. I'm wondering if zack11742 had said, "I feel like it would hurt HIM more than you." would you still have made your comment?

the thing is, for this FML, most seem to assume op is a male

#35, yes. Is that a trick question? I think the comment would have been better if s/he had said "I just hope OP's not a girl" or something along those lines. That way you account for both if you choose to speculate. :) But I'm a bit pedantic, so I'm not surprised that others don't care that much. XD

Haha you're right I assumed op was a guy silly me

I just feel bad for the girl. At least you two were still "protected"