Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, after my wife and I have been trying for a baby for 2 years, I found out she's still on the pill. Apparently when she was a teen she had bad period cramps, so her doctor gave her the pill for the pain. She never realized it stops pregnancy. FML
Today, for the last two years of trying for a baby, my wife has been secretly still on the pill and takes a morning after pill every time we had sex. Funny, I thought we both wanted a baby, so I guess she doesn’t. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, my wife and I had zero interest in being parents, so she's on the pill and I always wear a condom, but now, with my vasectomy less than a week away, she somehow got pregnant and decides she wants to keep it. FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, after six months of trying, my wife was convinced she was finally pregnant with our first baby, which we put off having for years until we got our careers, savings and house where we needed them. One trip to the doctor's and it’s not pregnancy, it’s early onset menopause at 37. FML
Today, I found out that after using several types of birth control, and being paranoid about pregnancy, I've been infertile for years. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
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Top comments
Llama_Face89 33
Well..you didn't marry her for her brain..
carry_on 19
I'm not sure your wife should be allowed to have kids to be honest...
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Comments (111)
Cupcake040 17
..................well if she does get pregnant I hope the child get your brains.....cause that's pretty bad......hopefully you haven't gone to a fertility specialist and wasted that money
MinorDisturbance 4
Reading all these FMLs makes me think I am way too picky seeing as I won't date complete idiots.
stef44_fml 2
your kids are going to be stupid....
SiHa00095 15
This deserves so many "facepalms"
FloMarDee 19
she really might not need to reproduce... dodged the bullet there, dontcha think?
AnitaNuLyfe 2
Guys, maybe she just didn't have the heart to tell him she wasn't ready :p either way, sorry man.
L02_fml 5
Is she blonde? I'm quite sure I read a joke similar to this sometime back?
eg4988 4
*blonde joke*
thespasmchasm 8
Orrrr maybe she doesn't want kids and thinks you're stupid enough to believe her reason
bmanholmes 3
Who would complain about 5 months of unprotected sex that would be the shit!