Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML
Today, I woke up to my whole room ruined, it was a mess and everything was torn and chewed up. I suddenly see a dog walk across the hall. I don't have a dog. FML
Today, I awoke to a strange feeling on my feet. It felt like a tongue, so at first thought it was the dog, but we don't have one. I looked down and it was my roommate. FML
Today, I walked into my apartment happy to see my dog. Instead of running to greet me, he ran straight past me to jump into the arms of my roommate, who had just walked in behind me. He wagged his tail like crazy while I stood there, rejected. FML
Today, I was walking to my room. My friend's dog, who has always seemed to hate me for no reason, let out the loudest bark he could muster the moment he saw me. Not only did he scare the absolute fuck out of me, he also made me drop my pizza. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
Today, my mother woke me up at 4:30 A.M. to tell me our dog was running down the street. I ran for an hour, chasing after her. Turns out it was our new neighbor's dog. Ours was in our basement. FML
Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML
Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML
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Top comments
10_4Franky 0
OMG. You monster.
yummycupcakegirl 0
awww how could you not know it was a puppy?:(
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Comments (364)
robc32ca 4
stupid human kicks are for kids
SirJoseph 0
that puppy is gonna bite you when it gets older I bet
arandomboy 0
what's gonna happen is it's gonna become afraid of humans and bite the roommate or the OP, causing it to be put down. Grats OP.
far_east 6
what the **** you careless shit how can you not tell the difference between a rat and a puppy?!? idiot.. if you broke its bones or killed it... i swear i will pay your roomate to kill you.. or me come break your ******* puppy kicking legs! BUDDY
EmeraldArcher 10
#49, your ignorance and stupidity has made my day.
Randen_fml 0
agreed, chicken shit.
FamiliarEyes 0
you fail at life
SaRah_In_LoVe 0
...HOW...does that happen?!
bishhitsandii 3
D: Poor little puppy!
RainbowBitch15 11
Ydi for being such a pansy. pretty sure if I ever "accidentally" kicked a puppy (which I'm not STUPID enough to do), I would be rushing it to the vet to make sure it was okay. I would NOT waste precious puppy-life-saving time on FML! I hope Karma kicks you HARD!
thatmetalguyx 0
omfg lol you're goin to he'll.
nerdsgetmehot 23
I'd like to say that you deserve it, but I know that it's tough not to react in some defensive way when you're panicked.