Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML
Today, I woke up to my whole room ruined, it was a mess and everything was torn and chewed up. I suddenly see a dog walk across the hall. I don't have a dog. FML
Today, I awoke to a strange feeling on my feet. It felt like a tongue, so at first thought it was the dog, but we don't have one. I looked down and it was my roommate. FML
Today, I walked into my apartment happy to see my dog. Instead of running to greet me, he ran straight past me to jump into the arms of my roommate, who had just walked in behind me. He wagged his tail like crazy while I stood there, rejected. FML
Today, I was walking to my room. My friend's dog, who has always seemed to hate me for no reason, let out the loudest bark he could muster the moment he saw me. Not only did he scare the absolute fuck out of me, he also made me drop my pizza. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
Today, my mother woke me up at 4:30 A.M. to tell me our dog was running down the street. I ran for an hour, chasing after her. Turns out it was our new neighbor's dog. Ours was in our basement. FML
Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML
Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML
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Top comments
10_4Franky 0
OMG. You monster.
yummycupcakegirl 0
awww how could you not know it was a puppy?:(
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Comments (364)
discrazypimp 0
scared much? haha
Schizomaniac 24
I don't see the FML in this. Everyone knows that at one point in their life, they have wondered what it would be like to kick a puppy and watch it soar.
loso86 2
FTW
fakeaccountX 6
HE PUNTED BAXTERRRRRRRRRRRR
tencentsakiss 19
yes. exactly what I was thinking
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'M IN A GLASS BOX OF EMOTION!
tencentsakiss 19
greatest movie of all time. period.
tatiee_fml 0
You puppy kicker!!!
Mars_Bars_Big_Na 0
u bitch!!!!
bglad09 0
are you related to Michael Vick?
Miolene 6
You just kick things before you realise what they are? As I am sure your now aware, thats a stupid idea. What the heck did you think it was anyway, a giant rat? Good thing it wasn't someones child crawling across the floor towards you or you'd be sat in prison right about now.
mella622 0
op you are a worthless pos.
valdez182 0
that is some funny shit. it made me laugh!! :)