what a he'll of a first experience for you OP, at least you have a good story to tell your kids when they are older?

like OP will be able to have kids after that. even if he does, they're gonna be slower than normal. you dont crush your balls and have normal kids afterwards.

Wow, OP. LIKE A BOSS. Props, man.

32 - this wasn't his first time. he said first time in I don't know how long (aka in a while)

wow you are a trooper for continuing after she crushed them. next time though go with a smaller girl lol

smaller as in weight.

that's what they call busting a nut...

how the hell can you act cool? I would cry a very manly cry...

lol nice

Bruised? He'll have kids just fine. People get bruising in hernia operations all the time.

There is a part on a womens body that is called "Egg pan"....Thats in the middle of the vagina and the asswhole....Thats were the mans "eggs" crush againts wen fucking...Im asuming he fucked em up there xD

that's complete made up BS. There is no such part of the female body. Geez, read a medical anatomy book.

55 ...too...many...big...words *head explodes*

55, all true, but where is the asswhole located?

3- u can thumb me down but when i first saw your pic i saw a giant shit someone had taken in a toilet lol

infront of the asshalf, everybody knows that.

pwnd by the dictionary!!! yeeees

she had a massive ass

haha 109 just made my day lmfao!

it wasnt a GIRLS balls it was his.

soccergurl95 is awesome!!

yah soccergurl95 is pretty much hot

55 your a dumbass

I meant 51 not 55. My iPods gay

*you're

You made a typo and somehow that makes your iPod a homosexual? Get some better vocabulary.

Why is that your favourite part? Maybe she wasn't allowed to spend the night with him, they still seem like teenagers to me. And he didn't call her his girlfriend, so it might even be a random girl. But even then there is no reason to call her a hooker.

once you get the bill from the hospital, you are gonna realize how much that sex really cost you.......

27, on FML you can call anyone hookers. That's how teh Interwebz work.

@27 in the world of fml, everyone whos not the person commenting or their friends is either a whore or a prude. its kind of like a tag for stupidity.

time to crush her ovaries!

It's going to look like you got a BJ from a smurf.

lol

haha

Nah, forget blue balls. He got himself a nice pair of green ones. You know, from all the radiation he'll be getting for his testicular cancer.

You obviously don't understand how hot this girl was, and the imperativeness of taking it like a man.

Taking it like a man, as only a man can.

meant don't have blue balls.

reverse cow girl sucks, u gotta go helicopter or the safer missionary position

35 - Tell me more! I want to know all about the positions you use! ...Wait, no I don't.

hey buddy go fuck yourself :)

so wait, you have to lie the girl on top of you and spin her?

You hold the tears back untill she leaves, then start bawling.

Give 87 some thumb love, they said "bawling".

my thoughts exactly! he must have a good popopopopopoker face

you arent supposed to

99- I can think of a few kinds of "thumb love" 87 might be interested in.

teabag

dude this is crazy this has happend to me to it f****** hurts