Today, after coming back from deployment, I found a homeless guy had broken into my house and made it his home for the last 5 months. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Today, I arrived home to find I'd been broken in to. The culprit? An obese homeless man, who I found face down, unconscious, and surrounded by muesli bar wrappers in my pantry. He broke in, ate everything in sight, soiled himself, and passed out. The worst part? The cops don't even believe me. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I had just gotten home after being away for 8 months. My key didn’t work on my lock and while I was messing the door a man with a child opened. My landlord gave someone my apartment while I was away. FML
Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML
Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML
Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML
Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML
Today, I got home and found all my things thrown out into the yard, including the stuff from my mancave, which I spent thousands of dollars on. Apparently, my girlfriend stopped for a visit while my wife was home. I’d stupidly given her a key. Turns out my wife called out sick today. FML
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Top comments
hannahtaskey 9
probably the best 5 months of his life.
Iamnotmyself 17
Considering your an army person, I would declare a battle for your house. Rules: One M16 2 clips 1 knife A grenade And a dog
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Comments (192)
juliaaalove 8
I bet that was a warm welcome home soldier :)
HatefulPilot 0
I would've kicked the guy's ass. Anyway, @OP: thank you for serving.
itsgen 16
room mates!! :D
FMLaddict20 5
At least you did a good thing for a homeless guy
carlos12 0
Cool. It be pretty cool to have a homeless guy in my house. They are pretty darn crazy but funny fun with their stories of younger days.
milou_fml 6
You should use a blacklight. On your whole house.
RayanneY 0
So thats why the steak was dissapearing!
Mirorbo 26
Calling the police hasn't yet come to mind?
Lights_Out_fml 6
It's better than your ex-wife sneaking in and won't leave
Enigmax2514 7
1) gtfo there 2) contact all army buddies 3) iniciate operation lock down 4) commence building securing 5) throw in some grenades, shoot some rocket launchers and nuke the target 6) move out and finish that bastard with a few clips of m16 7) occupy and set up camp 8) disinfect the perimeter, you sure as hell don't want the walking dead springing up from your base camp ---mission accomplished--- Enemies neutralised Camp secured Honourable discharge earned
itsgen 16
all that drama for a poor homeless?? he can just take him to a shelter
Hyman_Hunter 0
Initiate*** and house is now radioactive and completely demolished due to nuke as well as continent around it and is now no longer inhabitable .^_^ like Chernobyl XD
Enigmax2514 7
Exactly I was being sarcastic, and thanks for the spelling check
middlekid2 5
Your a ******* idiot
Enigmax2514 7
You're the ******* idiot if you can't take a joke
Iamnotmyself 17
I guess it just isn't in your nature to recognize our god and creator Mr. Grinch when you see him tsk tsk.
0pt1mus 6
I still agree with 44
yayyer 0
-35 why so the homeless man can get mugged he is better of on the streets
Hyman_Hunter 0
SURPRISE!!!!!! :D He's your welcoming party (: