Intimacy: Time consumed

Time consumed

By unendowed - 18/03/2012 02:11 - United States - Katy

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 408

You deserved it 11 695

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Same thing different taste

By tLee - 19/07/2011 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 493

You deserved it 4 557

By Prinpette - 20/09/2011 21:20 - France

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 335

You deserved it 40 455

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 085

You deserved it 40 021

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 08:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 245

You deserved it 34 481

By mrricecakes - 23/03/2012 05:55 - United States - Gilbert

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 394

You deserved it 5 231

Nice outing

By Anonymous - 07/12/2019 05:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 377

You deserved it 746

By omfgnooo - 09/09/2011 23:22 - United States

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 854

You deserved it 54 868

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 07:35 - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 832

You deserved it 4 847

Tasty

By I wish it was gum - 23/10/2018 12:00

Today, I was in the cinema making out with my girlfriend. I asked her if she could stop trying to pass me her gum because it was kinda gross. She replied, "It's not gum, I just have bronchitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 037

You deserved it 674

By ydahs - 08/05/2009 21:17 - United States

Today, while in the hot tub with my friends, my gum fell out of my mouth and I had no idea where it went. Later that night I realized it had fallen down my swimsuit and had become adhered to my pubic hairs which then stuck to my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 762

You deserved it 19 606

pdp_fml 21

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:20

Why not try shaving down there? Girls like it because they don't have to smell your nasty sweat.

H_Brazell09 0

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:22

Maybe this is a sign to start shaving.

Comments

Faraz97 0

Monday 19 March 2012 23:10

I heard peanut butter is a great way of getting gum out of hair ;)

Ashley_ni_col_e 2

Monday 19 March 2012 23:30

You could use peanut butter or just cut it out

ASREAL611 0

Monday 19 March 2012 23:42

I guess she was trying to tell you shave ur pubes

jdawg2010 0

Tuesday 20 March 2012 0:06

Dirty pubes? Clean 'em up!

stassmoss 0

Tuesday 20 March 2012 2:51

Maybe if u didn't have pubes it wouldnt be a problem that's grossssssssss

granolabutt8 7

Tuesday 20 March 2012 7:11

Yeahh, grown men happen to have them. Go back to banging 13 year olds if you can't handle it.

Honeydall 3

Tuesday 20 March 2012 3:10

lmfao!

doof_fisch 2

Tuesday 20 March 2012 6:06

Orbit, eh? Just goes to show you that what goes around, cums around.

GoldenGrizzly 7

Tuesday 20 March 2012 6:38

Someone has a dirty mouth.

granolabutt8 7

Tuesday 20 March 2012 7:13

Did you try shaving it? Or at least cutting out where the gum was? Pubes aren't like the hair on your head; the public doesn't see them and they grow back in a week. Still sounds painful though "/