Time consumed

By unendowed - 18/03/2012 02:11 - United States - Katy

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 30 304
You deserved it 11 651

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Top comments

Why not try shaving down there? Girls like it because they don't have to smell your nasty sweat.

Maybe this is a sign to start shaving.

Comments

At least your pubes smell good.

This is why you shave down there...problem solved.

No but the gum would get stuck on the blade.

For a good clean feeling, no matter what! Dirty mouth? Clean it up with Orbit!

27- Shave before the entire experience happened not afterward..

I wouldn't complain, she got far enough down for it to reach his pubes

67 - My thoughts exactly

#67..Or he is small down there

Now that's what I call a sticky situation.

Dirty crotch? Clean it up with orbit :D

#67 all guys are sizes... So it may not have been that hard for her. Oh well OP got some

Maybe this is her way to say: -"It's time to shave!" ;)

Take it as a sign that she wants you to shave.

Dirty pubes? Clean them up with orbit.

Why would you let her? You surely noticed she was chewing gum...

mayb he wanted to see if it felt different...like when u go down on him after eating a couple of mints

Orbit, for a good clean bj, no matter what!

Hm, a guy not thinking clearly when offered with sexual pleasure. That's a new one, right? ;)

Lmao, this just reminds me of the movie sex drive

Why not try shaving down there? Girls like it because they don't have to smell your nasty sweat.

I agree, op fault for not shaving

Maybe she did it on purpose do he would have to shave them to get the gum out haha.

Some people actually like the smell of a man down there.

85, while it's true that we are subconsciously attracted to the smell of the opposite sexes sweat (let's face it, none of us openly admit or even realise it) no one likes day or two old sweat, especially down there. one can smell sweaty without having pubes! I think op should shave! or at least trim!

97- Yea..., pretty sure I'm neither consciously nor subconsciously attracted to the opposite sex's body odor. Especially, down there.

146 - It's been scientifically proven, look it up, bruhh

I agree with 97. If ya expect your girl to shave, return the favor.

Maybe they both don't shave.

I don't want people to have to damage themselves to fit an idea of not being nasty

No one likes when people use blanket statements either.

Maybe this is a sign to start shaving.

You know, maybe my mind is in the gutter on this one but I feel that your pic and comment go perfectly with this FML :)

Da fuck? Those are jellyfish...

No, they're testicles.

Jellyfish testicles?

It was all a ploy for her to not have to blow you!

nah she wanted him to shave and couldn't find a way to tell him

Minty fresh! :)

*BRITISH ACCENT* dirty mou.. cough cough pubes?

Specify 'British'

Glad in not the only one who thought about this!

Blame it on Cosmo...that stupid magazine keeps telling us to do stupid things like that!

I have always been terrified of trying ANYTHING out of Cosmo. Pulled pubes, bruised balls, and "broken" wieners is all I imagine happening, unfortunately.

uh nobody says you have to actually do it. I read cosmo and I do only like a fourth of what it says there.

blame yourself fpr actually listening to cosmo

Doesn't matter, still got some.

This comment just cracked my ass up.

You mean your ass was flat before? How did you ever take a shit?!

Chewing gum is the biggest turnoff ever, even without getting it into your pubes...

I vote that a "woman" with a penis is more of a turn off. If she and I were getting nasty I think I could tough it out if she was chewing gum. It would be a deal breaker if she had a wang.

Are you telling me that bad breath is a turn on?

WTF? Okay, I'll remember that next for the next time I eat Tuna.

Gum is gross. I agree. It makes your breath smell gross. Just brush your damn teeth and there ya go. No bad smelly mouth. You can't kiss someone with gum in there mouth and nothing is more annoying when they are constantly smacking it.

No smoking is the biggest turn off