Today, my coworker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my coworker told me that I needed to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML
Today, I went to the dentist and she told me, "If you don't stop smoking, yellow teeth aren't the only thing you'll have to worry about." I don't even smoke. FML
Today, I went to the dentist. After drilling my teeth for what seemed like hours, he gave me a long speech about how if I continue to smoke, the yellowing of my teeth won't be the only problem. I don't smoke. I never have. FML
Today, my manager took me aside and angrily told me to quit fucking about with our customers. He totally refuses to believe that the slight whistling sound I keep making when I exhale is because I have a chipped tooth. FML
Today, I found out the reason my co-workers have been giving me gum every day is not because of their generosity, but because everyone in the office thinks my breath smells. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML
Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
Today, my officemate used the telephone beside my desk again. I still can't think of a better way to tell him how awful bad his breath is without the having to do it personally. We've been workmates for a year now and he still hasn't gotten a clue, despite of me covering my nose every time. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
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Top comments
GemmaStyles 14
Maybe you should take that as a sign to start brushing your teeth, hm.
babybebop2 4
That was very rude of him to say your breath smells like shit...but maybe YDI for having poor oral hygiene....too bad a friend could alert you to that nicely.
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Comments (138)
worldclassrager 41
mints and whitening strips to the rescue!
Dahlia89 2
Brush your teeth then
Austyn57 1
are u british
rightside5 2
Ew! Brush your freaking teeth!
sherivengeance 3
Oh dear... Carry some gum and invest in teeth whitening. Your coworker is very rude though. Light a poop bag under his seat.
MargaretColleen 8
You should have told them to stop making assumptions because it makes him seem like a bigoted asshole.
TcheQ 12
ydi, brush your teeth, floss, and use mouthwash. And go to the dentist.
N1GHTS 12
That was a rude of him but maybe you should start brushing your teeth. Don't forget to floss!
angeluv_2014 22
brush your ****** teeth
moonboobs 4
Bro! Chew some gum or something! I had a teacher in highschool that made me believe she would give her husband a bj everyday before school cuz her breath was so bad.