Miscellaneous: Ouch

Ouch

By lifesmells - 27/06/2009 00:29 - Canada

Today, I learned that when blender jars aren't locked, they fly off the blender, into the air, hit you in the head and explode all over your kitchen. Today, I also learned that after I'm attacked by a flying blender, the first thing my boyfriend asks is if I'm still gonna make him a smoothie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 827

You deserved it 13 103

Miscellaneous

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Same thing different taste

Smooth blend

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 16:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I was excited to try out my new blender, but when I turned it on, the lid flew off and sprayed smoothie all over my kitchen. Now I have a fruity polka dot pattern on parts of my kitchen's walls and ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 334

By JBone - 22/01/2009 07:02 - Canada

Today, I was making a smoothie. I didn't plug in the blender until after all the ingredients were inside. I pushed the 'on' button. It was still on when I went to plug it in. With no lid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 411

You deserved it 33 318

By cutiepatootie - 03/01/2010 05:04 - United States

Today, I was getting ready for a party and accidentally knocked my blender off the counter. After taking a half an hour to clean up all the glass, I went upstairs to get the spare blender I keep in the closet. I tripped, and broke the blender. I just applied for a waitressing job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 044

You deserved it 6 708

Kitchen nightmares

By Accident-prone af - 07/07/2020 20:02

Today, while making milkshakes, I was pouring and the blender's blades all fell out somehow. I don't know what's worse, that I sliced my finger open when the blades fell out and now there's blood all over, that there's now melted ice cream all over my counter and floor, or that I just wasted an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 483

You deserved it 197

By manicmandy - 01/08/2010 20:24 - United States

Today, I learned that ice cubes do not cool down hot oil. Instead, it causes a massive explosion of hot grease to splatter all over my parents' kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 498

You deserved it 78 547

By Anonymous - 28/09/2016 13:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my kitchen is trying to kill me. So far, I've hit my head three times on cupboards that opened themselves, cut open my hand on the microwave door when it slammed shut, and burned my cheek with the "heat-proof" oven mitt when I pushed the hair off my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 256

You deserved it 2 494

By TexasGirl24 - 10/09/2016 12:51 - United States - Houston

Today, I was making a shake at work when the cup fell off the blender. I went to catch it, and instead caught the teeth of the still-spinning mixer. When my hand was still bleeding five minutes later, my supervisor told me to clock out until it stopped. I lost money for getting hurt on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 619

You deserved it 1 213

Heart of Glass

By blahblahblah - 15/04/2020 20:00

Today, I was sitting on a stool by the stove while my dad was making stir-fry. The glass lid he had covering the skillet overheated and exploded. As huge shards of broken glass rained down on his only daughter's head, my dad's only concern was whether or not he would have to throw his food away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 637

You deserved it 199

By sassy_girl144 - 29/05/2015 10:58 - United Kingdom - Newbury

Today, I learned one of life's great lessons: it is possible to squeeze a Ketchup bottle so hard that the plastic breaks and everything lands on your face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 393

You deserved it 6 253

By Anonymous - 08/02/2016 17:43 - Austria

Today, I made a delicious casserole for dinner. Just as I was about to serve it, a bowl fell from the cupboard above, exploded on the counter and made it rain tiny, sharp glass shards on my food. I can't pick them all out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 891

You deserved it 1 782

Seti_fml 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:06

haven't you ever seen someone use a blender before? did you ever wonder why they always had a hand on the top of it? lol i hate to sound so mean, but you seriously deserve it... i mean really! thats a lack of common sense right there

crazy_cat_lady24 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:37

You didn't clean your kitchen for weeks?

Comments

Seti_fml 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:06

the_elle_factor 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:41

I agree.... Everybody knows you need to watch what you're doing with a blender. YDI

amandajj 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 18:07

Depends on the blender, really. A good blender, you shouldn't need to keep you hand on top of it... that is why the lid locks in place. However if you have a cheap'o piece of crap, then I guess you do...

mazuma 0

Tuesday 4 May 2010 6:48

what did OP expect?? now stop complaining, and go make me some dinner!

wintamint101 7

Monday 30 May 2011 21:52

shoulda made him a sandwich instead

poper123 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:06

Hahaha. Happened to me a while ago, and my kitchen was covered in milkshake for weeks.

crazy_cat_lady24 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:37

You didn't clean your kitchen for weeks?

nobeans6131 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:07

hahahahHHAHHAHAhahahahahahHAHAHAHHhhahahahHAHAHHAhHHAHAHAhahahaha hes kool

girandwogpig 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 15:43

He's not cool hes a pimp!!

emmmilyyy 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:08

haha thats ****** laamee..... i hope youre ok. dump your boyfriend too he's obv a useless sack of bullshit

Dante167 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 22:43

#4 How bout you take out the rag and calm down.

Shizden 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:09

Mine locks on then does it :D

clutchcake 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:09

What do you expect him to ask? If it wasn't for your utter incomptetence the man would be drinking deliciousness right now. Also, have you never seen a sitcom. Exploding blenders are sitcom 101.