Animals: Sorry Stuart…

Sorry Stuart…

By connor1701 - 27/02/2017 20:00

Today, I went to put my coat on to go out. I put my hand in my pocket, not knowing there was a mouse sleeping in there. I squeezed it, it bit me and ran off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 353

You deserved it 642

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Same thing different taste

By goldenpuppy - 19/05/2016 20:54 - United States - Somerville

Today, I was sitting on my couch when I felt something weird underneath me. I got up, thinking I'd sat on my phone or something. Wrong. I'd sat on a live mouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 138

You deserved it 1 068

By Anonymous - 05/10/2014 17:04 - United States - Louisville

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 635

You deserved it 3 722

By killer - 17/07/2010 14:54 - United States

Today, I was outside when a mouse ran toward my feet. There was a wall behind me, so I tried to jump over him. He changed course, and I landed on him. It crunched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 835

You deserved it 8 112

By animal lover... - 05/10/2013 22:34

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 886

You deserved it 4 039

Sorry Mr Nibbles

By JustMyLuck - 06/09/2009 01:31 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. Out of natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 002

You deserved it 52 222

Spooky

By mike - 11/03/2011 18:34 - United States

Today, I set up a mouse trap to kill the rodent plaguing my kitchen. While lying in bed, I heard an unmistakable snap, and ran to see what I'd caught. The mouse trap was missing. I now have a large, angry, and possibly dying animal running around my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 578

You deserved it 7 160

By GrahamCracker - 21/05/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 662

You deserved it 8 933

By ambushcat - 06/07/2012 03:31 - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 506

You deserved it 28 622

By AquaKelly - 24/12/2014 01:48 - United States - Newark

Today, I set a trap to catch a mouse that ran across my foot. Not only did the trap shut on my finger twice, but I watched the mouse run over the trap without it snapping shut. I guess I have a new roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 813

You deserved it 4 757

Stuart?

By Tea_baggins - 06/08/2013 04:01 - Australia - Rozelle

Today, I woke up at 6 a.m. and went into the kitchen, where I saw a mouse in front of the fridge. Petrified, I stood in the doorway shooing it for a few minutes. My husband then walked into the kitchen, picked up the "mouse", and threw it in the bin. It was a used tea bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 347

You deserved it 19 773

dabomsht123 3

Monday 27 February 2017 20:12

Poor mouse!! That's a rough way to be woke up!! Imagine if a giant hand squeezed u while u were sleeping in a warm dark place. Lol

jdogg1971 0

Monday 27 February 2017 20:05

Go to a doctor it might carry a disease

Comments

mackdeezy 22

Monday 27 February 2017 20:01

If you woke me up in such a way, I'm not sure I'd bite you, but I would hurt you.

jdogg1971 0

Monday 27 February 2017 20:05

Go to a doctor it might carry a disease

bahamit 18

Monday 27 February 2017 21:13

Hps is a bad one carried by mice, can be fatal, go get checked, have blood work done... definitely get checked...

dabomsht123 3

Monday 27 February 2017 20:12

Poor mouse!! That's a rough way to be woke up!! Imagine if a giant hand squeezed u while u were sleeping in a warm dark place. Lol

s2kname 9

Monday 27 February 2017 21:02

well it sounds a lot like a ****** so pretty happy is my answer

Mooglefox 23

Monday 27 February 2017 20:32

AlwYs knew Mickey was a bitter.

Cali 54

Tuesday 28 February 2017 17:57

Walt Disney never gave him fair compensation! And don't even get me started on Jerry...

jcash52426 5

Monday 27 February 2017 20:38

What did you think was in your pocket that you were squeezing?

cakefete2 30

Monday 27 February 2017 20:53

Mickey Mouse made a squeaky clean get away. At least you have good taste in outerwear.

Hippo_Holiday 19

Tuesday 28 February 2017 3:05

And do I get to tend the rabbits? Yes lennie ya do.

emischeve 12

Friday 3 March 2017 4:43

The end to that was so sad

Unfuckwittable 2

Wednesday 1 March 2017 11:09

You must be filthy to have rat in your clothes

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The Top

Today, I threw an elaborate surprise birthday party for my boyfriend of four years. He thought we were going to a quiet dinner but when we arrived, thirty of his friends jumped out and surprised him. Instead of kissing me to thank me, he broke up with me because of how easily I had lied to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 720

You deserved it 4 756

Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 915

You deserved it 44 864

The Top

Today, I took my iPod to Walmart to replace the battery. They tell me to call Apple. I go home again and call Apple. They tell me to call Walmart. I call Walmart. They tell me to bring it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 801

You deserved it 3 969

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 756

You deserved it 3 338

Today, I received many compliments from my co-workers on the weight I've lost and how nice I look. I haven't slept for the past month, and eating makes me nauseous. I don't have the heart to tell them my secret is anxiety and depression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 688

You deserved it 138

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 550

You deserved it 2 179

Today, my mom called my workplace and told my boss to make sure I wear a hat so I didn't get heatstroke like I did on my last shift. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 704

You deserved it 3 957

Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 139

You deserved it 4 772