Sinners, the lot of you

By Anonymous - 02/09/2018 04:00

Spicy
Today, we were at church when I pulled my toddler’s hand out of his pants, and he screamed, "I WAS MAKING MY PENIS BIG!" I need a new church. FML
I agree, your life sucks 3 637
You deserved it 456
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Top comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

I think OP was saying they'd be too embarrassed to go back after this little incident, not that the church was banning them.

33 0
BurnInDemonFire 34

I'm surprised he wasn't marched to the front of the congregation, and exorcised on the spot.

36 3

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

I'm surprised he wasn't marched to the front of the congregation, and exorcised on the spot.

36 3
interesting33 36

I sincerely hope that was exaggeration on the needing a new church. Your young son was masturbaring as children do, and didn't know what he was doing or that it was not socially acceptable to do publically, and they would maker you change church for that??? If that is true that is not Christlike behaviour.

25 12
BurnInDemonFire 34

I think OP was saying they'd be too embarrassed to go back after this little incident, not that the church was banning them.

33 0
Pulman 13

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
6 26
ari330 21

yes it is, a lot of toddlers, girls and boys **********, and they don't stop because they like the feeling and don't understand why it's wrong

0 0
amanda86 8

It is actually pretty normal. Maybe you should look it up

0 0
tmj25789 23

Pullman, it is totally normal for that age to explore their body. It may seem unnatural but it's not and nothing to worry about for a toddler.

0 0
Mathalamus 24

It isn't normal? Huh... I thought toddlers would do pretty much anything without regard for anything...

13 4
bluejello2001 18

Toddlers being obsessed with their privates is totally natural. Especially boys. They don't understand what masturbation is. Just that there's this really fun and interesting part of their body and it kind of feels fun to play with it. It can take a bit of teaching to get them to understand that they shouldn't touch themselves in public, but kids eventually get it.

20 4
Charlie Given 26

Aww come on he just wanted to show god how big it was 😏

3 4
real life problems 26

I always thought in catholic church the Pope makes his penis big with kids around him

10 11
RichardPencil 30

I hear there’s a new church forming started by a priest who ***** his pants.

16 6
blondie45 21

Hilarious!! I bet every mother in church was silently thanking God that for once it wasn’t their toddler embarrassing them 😂 I remember walking around the shops with my 3 year old son and he spotted the tampon shelf. “Look Mummy, there are those things you put up your pum!”

7 0
tmj25789 23

Every mom there was probably nodding their heads when this happened. 😂

3 0
Chazzster 28

I can only imagine how embarrassing that was! But have you not noticed the little guy doing that before elsewhere? In the church pew during services is not generally the best place to deal with the “appropriate time and place” conversation. Obviously at the right time and place ************ is not a big deal. But around other people is not appropriate....

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