Love: Priorities - FML

Priorities

By mapollis - 20/01/2010 07:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for the fifth time, and all I could say was, "Can I have my parking permit back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 385

You deserved it 31 864

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Same thing different taste

By ish - 14/08/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in the parking lot right before a baseball game, then convinced me to still go to the game in tears. After the game, we were walking back to the car and he goes, "so, how about some break up lovin'?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 898

You deserved it 9 277

By rplovez - 05/09/2011 23:14 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 294

You deserved it 4 018

Get out

By Anonymous - 23/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to break up with me again, and actually offered me gas money so that I would leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 1 975

By DramaQueen - 19/07/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. As I left his house and began to drive away, I see him chasing after my car barefoot. I stop and roll down the window, ready to listen to the speech he has prepared to win me over with. He takes a moment to catch his breath and says "I want my cellphone back". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 826

You deserved it 62 760

By cockalicious - 01/03/2011 05:29

Today, my boyfriend let me know he wanted me to leave by repeatedly jabbing me with my car keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 706

You deserved it 5 020

Wrong place, wrong time

By lug_nut - 06/01/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 440

You deserved it 3 331

By iJuli - 08/04/2012 05:17 - United States - Billings

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 391

You deserved it 2 670

By neverdatingacopagain - 25/04/2011 04:24 - United States

Today, I woke up to find a parking ticket on my car. My car was in my driveway and the cop who wrote it is my ex-boyfriend. This is the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 967

You deserved it 6 718

Independence day

By independence - 07/07/2011 04:04 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me because he wanted some independence. He moved back into his parents' house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 726

You deserved it 3 597

By Anonymous - 28/02/2011 03:23

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 207

You deserved it 50 943

Next

Top comments

Reality_bites 14

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:10

OP, why would you let him break up with you FIVE times? I mean I know you probably think you love the guy but where is your self-respect? What i see if that he thinks he can do better than you so he breaks up with you. Then realises he cant or that the grass isnt greener or that hot girl he had his eye on he doesnt have a chance with. So he comes back. And then decides that he wants to be single just in case someone better comes along. And then well you know. He breaks up with you again. If he comes crawling back for the sixth time, tell him to stick it where the sun dont shine. And mean it. Dont let him break up with you for a sixth time.

SliceNthrice 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:08

naw the 7th time is it, you can never go wrong at 7.

Comments

darkmis1 17

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:42

Maybe it's time to permanently end it :-/

iankennedy17 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:55

that's not even funny. OP, you are an idiot.

MrAdventure 1

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:06

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me five times? Well, you deserved it, and we didn't deserve to hear about it.

judemeister 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:09

And you continued to date him why?

AntiChrist7 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:11

5th time. YDI for not learning anything. Girls only love assholes

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:44

No ring to give back? If a parking permit is the biggest thing you share it is time to move on. Let him park his POS in public parking.

SubjectX 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:47

5th time? Jesus you are hopeless.

carrotpuke 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:49

...so what's the problem? You have your parking permit, now don't get back together with him, lady.

roaminginsomniac 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:56

Why are you dumb enough to take him back over and over and over? Stop that! Don't be a loser if you don't HAVE to!

NotVeryOriginal 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:57

This was pretty dumb

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The Top

Today, I got called in for a second job interview for a position I'd applied for. When I met the interviewer, she smiled and told me to have a seat. She pulls out her phone and says, “So, care to explain this?” It was one of my TikToks from ages ago of me singing the "N-word" over and over again. I forgot I had that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70

You deserved it 954

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 263

You deserved it 2 123

The Top

Today, I was knocked into a wall by a high-pressure water cannon suddenly kicking in. I was only going to the corner store to buy some chocolate. Probably serves me right for not noticing a small riot due to a thumping hangover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 038

You deserved it 7 023

Today, it took me 2 hours to get my toddler to sleep. Just after I got him down, my mom woke him up by banging my pots and pans around in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 120

Today, my uncle is posting on Facebook for clout about how his mom died of COVID. She actually died of sepsis from severe Alzheimer's. He was at the hospice meeting, and his wife and daughter held her hand when she passed. She also died two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 88

Today, my family sat me down and told me I was spending way too much time with my boyfriend and not enough time with them. My boyfriend has been away in Iraq for six months and just came home a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 727

You deserved it 2 588

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 186

You deserved it 46 848

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 459

You deserved it 7 974