Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML
Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML
Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
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Top comments
evan_7899 28
Fly:1 Idiot:0
luckysilverbell 5
It's FMLs like this one that make me wish I had a penis.
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Comments (93)
goth_pixie 15
Genius.
CrazyMelvin 14
Grow up
1947Chevy 17
But I wanna be a toys r us kid
nightfire2258 24
You must be a real joy at parties...
Enslaved 36
It's ******* like the OP why public restrooms are so nasty!
Kiki242 19
As soon as I read "I thought it would be funny to" I knew it was a YDI.
EdenCrystal 21
That's just a good rule in general for FML.
spoo 24
Hmm, can we put this on YDI.com?
Axipiter 24
"Another man came in time to see it." This last sentence made me feel quite awkward...
Mandybruin 15
Me, too! I'm glad I wasn't the only one disturbed by that. Definitely needs to be reworded.
Faeryl_fml 6
And this is only an FML because someone came in, right? You deserve this to happen at your house
smokecloud_ 37
Here we see the male human asserting his dominance over a tiny winged insect with a stream of his urine.
thepelvicwoo 8
YDI, next time, stop dicking around. Ha!!!
RabbitOfAurora 28
This explains so much about male restrooms.