Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I never achieved an orgasm with any of my past partners, and therefore telling him what I need to get there, he won't even touch me, let alone do anything "down there" because he has never done it on any of his past girlfriends, and thinks it's gross. I make sure to always be fresh and clean. FML
Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML
Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML
Today, according to my boyfriend, getting me to orgasm takes so long that about 90% of his mental energy is directed at him trying not to orgasm first, so he never really enjoys himself. When he fails to get me to orgasm, I apparently use the forbidden sex phrase “It's fine” which makes him feel worse. FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend has so many hang ups about being good at sex that when we actually had sex for the first time this morning, he got upset that I was touching my clit while he was inside me. Apparently it was a sign I think he’s bad at it, and had to do it myself. Neither of us orgasmed today. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mpj13 8
Tell him to stop asking questions then
alexup24 13
curiosity killed the cat, and the ******...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (162)
jaytee1994 9
Tell him to to stop asking till he hears you screaming that your coming!! Or let me give him few pointers. :)
perdix 31
Was he one of those whiny brats who incessantly asked "Are we there yet?" The answers to the questions are, "I was until you stopped," and "Your tongue work, yes; your gum-flapping, no."
donut_gurl 8
so tell him "don't stop" or "that feels good" before he stops....
hqbrat 8
Next time inform him
poopshreds 10
just say "oh yes keep going" or is it more fun sitting in silence and not doing anything?
mgladin 0
He prolly doesn't have alot of confidence. You're prolly one of those quite types because when you started having sex, and maybe even now, you were quite so you wouldn't get caught. So be more vocal. Then you'll ****** and he will have newly found confidence which will make him better.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Quiet* Also, prolly? It's "probably". You're welcome.
kendylpaige_25 4
Just tell him to not ask questions next time and to just keep goin at it.
bowser_rawr16 13
Are you dating my ex? Because he seriously did every single time too.
GothInside 6
Do the same thing to him when ur going down on him!
PartyxRocked 0
Just inform him not to. Probably by shoving his head back down there.