Today, I was having some fun with a guy, but I had to fake orgasm twice just so he would get out of me it was that shit. Third guy in a row. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied, "That's OK, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
Today, I tried faking an orgasm for the first time, because I thought it would be sexy for my boyfriend. He stopped to ask me if I was okay. I guess I'm not good at faking it. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. Today, I also learned how to fake an orgasm. Twice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML
Today, I was having a hot telephone conversation with my boyfriend who lives in another state. Unfortunately, I even have to fake orgasms during phone sex. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
Either you have a “type” that you tend to date and have sex with that isn’t really working for you or you are not very good at sex yourself… The thing in common with your latest unfulfilling experiences is you. Good sex comes from attitude, equipment, and skill. Skill can be learned if you pay attention to what works for you AND your partner and listen to both your partner and your body. Attitude is a state of mind - Everyone responds better to someone who wants to be with them. The equipment I am referring to is your body. There’s a limited capability to improve on the equipment you are born with, at least in the short term. But skill and attitude can be improved. Finally, real sex isn’t really like the **** videos. Women rarely get to ****** as quickly or as easily as a man - But on the other hand a female ****** can sometimes last longer than a man’s ******. And the great majority of male/female **** is usually created for the enjoyment of its mostly male audience.
RichardPencil 32
Oh, that's a bad sign. If you were hot, guys would finish quickly and they'd be out too fast.
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Comments (4)
Chazzster 32
Either you have a “type” that you tend to date and have sex with that isn’t really working for you or you are not very good at sex yourself… The thing in common with your latest unfulfilling experiences is you. Good sex comes from attitude, equipment, and skill. Skill can be learned if you pay attention to what works for you AND your partner and listen to both your partner and your body. Attitude is a state of mind - Everyone responds better to someone who wants to be with them. The equipment I am referring to is your body. There’s a limited capability to improve on the equipment you are born with, at least in the short term. But skill and attitude can be improved. Finally, real sex isn’t really like the **** videos. Women rarely get to ****** as quickly or as easily as a man - But on the other hand a female ****** can sometimes last longer than a man’s ******. And the great majority of male/female **** is usually created for the enjoyment of its mostly male audience.
Grizz8831 14
also sounds pretty vanilla. if regular sex isn't cutting it, or is simply hit and miss, there is a good chance OP Has fallen into a pattern that has gotten boring. they should either find someone to teach to make them happy or people that mix up from their normal.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
If you're faking enjoyment then it's hardly surprising that he thought he did his job.
core01 30
There aren't many men who are good at sex. Either buy a toy and use during sex, or skip the guys completely.
RichardPencil 32
Oh, that's a bad sign. If you were hot, guys would finish quickly and they'd be out too fast.