Today, my husband said he felt "dizzy from blood loss" after his nose started "pissing blood." After I said the tiny drop of blood from his split second nose bleed wouldn't cause dizziness, he got mad at me for "attacking his masculinity." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML
Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML
Today, my fiancé and I were discussing whether we should have a gun in the house or not. He argued that I’m too clumsy to have one. Offended, I turned around to storm off. I hit my forehead on the cabinet I'd left open and immediately started gushing blood. Point proved. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I sneezed without knowing I had a nosebleed. Despite turning my head, a fine blood spray shot out all over my fiancée’s white dress as we were standing at the altar. She refused to say “I do” because she was so mad. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, on the drive to church, I got a nosebleed. Not so bad, until I sneezed and splattered myself and my fiancé with blood, snot, and eventually tears. FML
Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML
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Top comments
princess_stabitty 20
You can't attack something that clearly isn't there.
genuinegoodguy 9
You probably lose more blood every menstrual cycle. Tell that to Mr Tough Guy.
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Comments (6)
princess_stabitty 20
You can't attack something that clearly isn't there.
genuinegoodguy 9
You probably lose more blood every menstrual cycle. Tell that to Mr Tough Guy.
Jonkbaby 23
I would get his blood pressure checked
DoctorPALO 14
YDI for being married to such a prissy little milquetoast.
123Puppy 33
He’s stupid.
-Silverfox- 10
Lots of people gets dizzy or pass out just by the sight of blood, though! Ie. having blood drawn or just a papercut.
JasonThorn 24
If that was this guy, he would get snippy about a drop or blood or get mad about attacking his one-ply masculinity. He'd just pass out.
aryania 7
fear of blood and testing masculinity are two different things.