Miscellaneous: Fighting talk

Fighting talk

By enya - 18/01/2016 22:29 - Luxembourg

Today, my dad and uncle got in an argument over money and ended up fighting in the back garden. Only, my dad is a muay thai fighter and my uncle is an MMA fighter, and they're refusing to stop until one of them is out cold. I foresee me driving them both to the hospital before midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 104

You deserved it 1 443

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Same thing different taste

Freaked

By Anonymous - 12/06/2023 15:00

Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 149

By Jim - 19/04/2016 17:25 - United States

Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 376

You deserved it 4 192

Demon drink

By Aliiveopen - 24/08/2020 07:02 - United States - Wasilla

Today, my mom got blackout drunk and tried to fight me, my stepdad, and my brother, resulting in my stepdad leaving, my brother getting 2 holes from a metal shelf my mom tried to joust him with, and I got bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 563

You deserved it 99

By hot_mess88 - 04/07/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, I got called to a biker bar to break up a fight between my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 111

You deserved it 2 587

By sonofaneuroticwench - 20/08/2014 20:08 - United States - Rice Lake

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 651

You deserved it 3 387

By skinsfan7592 - 08/02/2010 15:19 - United States

Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 147

You deserved it 44 078

Alpha

By Anonymous - 09/02/2022 18:01

Today, both my dad and boyfriend are serious weightlifters, plus my dad boxed in the army, and my boyfriend is a mixed martial artist. Ever since they met, they've been circling each other like bears in the forest trying to work out which is bigger and meaner before the fight even begins. They're both so childish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 265

Fun for all the family

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 02:00

Today, my mom and dad got into a fight, during which my dad said to my mom that her health conditions were of her own doing. Because of that, I got pissed and had a fight with my dad, taking my mom's side. Turns out, my mom took his side and ratted me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 267

Don't hate the player…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2023 14:00

Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 241

By fuckbucket14 - 14/04/2012 22:56 - Egypt - Hurghada

Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 925

You deserved it 12 131

rnayyyyy 12

Tuesday 19 January 2016 10:33

I'd actually like to see who would take out who first...

onlychildFTW 33

Tuesday 19 January 2016 10:33

Why drive them? They are tough guys obviously. They can drive themselves since thy are so tough.

Comments

noahghosthand 12

Wednesday 20 January 2016 0:20

ok I'll be taking bets on who will win

tomvertigo 17

Wednesday 20 January 2016 1:16

Call the police? Call an ambulance? Neighborhood watch? Anything other than posting an FML?

Bugg27 15

Wednesday 20 January 2016 1:38

Oh wow lol I can't wait to see the follow up on this...

SexyCheeksIzKool 15

Wednesday 20 January 2016 2:55

Well... Who won!?

LieutenantKitty 8

Wednesday 20 January 2016 3:39

Your dad is a TIE Fighter? Cool!

AScooterman 12

Wednesday 20 January 2016 4:07

You should probably sell tickets that way you can pay the medical bills easier

clair_brodie 35

Wednesday 20 January 2016 5:46

They have to get tired at some point. Just encourage them to do a collar choke to make it go by quicker.

NOXUS125 11

Wednesday 20 January 2016 6:12

Fatality!

Hildy93 21

Wednesday 20 January 2016 6:33

Were you writing this comment as they were fighting?

sillygirl247 14

Wednesday 20 January 2016 8:20

Wish I could of seen that.

Keywords

Lonely Dentist Sadness Health Awkward Work Abuse Parents Miscellaneous Birthday Mental health OCD Relatable Cute Housework Love Cleaning Kids Argument Cats Animals Underwear Intimacy Camping Bikes Vacation Boredom Friends Annoying Transportation

The Top

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 634

You deserved it 19 265

Today, I told my man that, in order to get me ready for sex within a minute whenever he wants, he only needs to relearn how to go down on me, which he used to do splendidly but has somehow forgotten. He apparently considers this too much effort and will rather keep groping me unsuccessfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 82

The Top

Today, during a family meal, my mother-in-law asked me to list the foods I didn't like, which includes bananas. For some reason my husband felt it was necessary to specify: "except mine!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 594

You deserved it 445

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 251

You deserved it 61 912

Today, I was diagnosed with food poisoning for the third time since moving to this base in Japan. My husband keeps cooking questionable meat and vegetables from the commissary because he thinks the food from a Japanese grocery store is radioactive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 793

You deserved it 2 133

Today, I was told to be present for a meeting that started at 5pm. I arrived 15 minutes early, and I was late for the meeting. This happens regularly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 089

You deserved it 281

Today, my wife stopped mid blowjob because it tasted too clean, like my mint shower gel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 815

You deserved it 269

Today, the girl I've been seeing for less than a week started raging and ended up threatening me with a knife, after I shot down her idea of getting married next month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 326

You deserved it 3 445