Miscellaneous: Fight Club

Fight Club

By MyFaceHurts - 03/08/2010 10:40 - United States

Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 855

You deserved it 55 498

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/12/2011 02:49 - Australia

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 149

You deserved it 41 733

By deven - 29/08/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 734

You deserved it 44 790

By brokennose - 26/08/2009 04:40 - United States

Today, I was at the bar and my friend and I were making fun of this guy wearing a Affliction muscle tee and bedazzled Ed Hardy hat. We were saying how he was the epitome of a douche bag and that he probably likes UFC. Turns out he's an MMA fighter and I now have a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 781

You deserved it 67 545

By Anonymous - 13/04/2016 08:25

Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 566

You deserved it 11 400

By Anonymous - 26/07/2015 14:27 - France - Paris

Today, my friends showed me a video of me blind drunk last night, getting into a fight with my front door. The door won, unlike my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 697

You deserved it 13 774

By knobbed - 27/01/2014 23:09 - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes

Today, I got a black eye while trying to break up a fight caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at the funeral of my best friend's mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 922

You deserved it 4 883

By JohnFarrell - 24/04/2009 17:20 - United States

Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 524

You deserved it 66 004

By itstillhurts - 21/12/2009 04:23 - United Kingdom

Today, I was down the pub with a mate and we got onto the subject of bar fights. I said I thought being glassed wouldn't actually hurt that much. My friend looks at me, calmly finishes his pint and then swiftly smashes his glass over my head. Turns out I was wrong. And we got kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 564

You deserved it 35 748

By haappynewyear - 01/01/2011 03:21 - United States

Today, I got into a nasty fight, and ended up leaving with a black eye. The fight was with a champagne bottle cork. I was opening the bottle to celebrate the New Year, at home, alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 992

You deserved it 6 091

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 097

You deserved it 3 316

5t3ff1k4h 44

Tuesday 3 August 2010 19:27

Never challenge drunks, even if you think they're joking. Period.

scottiealan 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 19:37

WTF don't mess with drunks! they are always serious with what they say, why do u think they tell you their secrets

Comments

soccer_chickk 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 22:42

stupidity kills..

xDpoohbear 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 22:53

your fault shouldn't have tried to joke with a drunk...

SirJoseph 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 23:01

ha an idiot and a pussy all in one.

Eohlas 4

Tuesday 3 August 2010 23:05

Your biggest mistake there: Thinking you know what a drunk person is thinking. YDI.

poorlittlelaurs 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 23:11

Drunk people take everything you say seriously, remember that.

mistired 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 0:11

dumbass

xXxbiancaxXx 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 0:20

well he was drunk... what did u expect... well u deffinitley learned ur lesson.. hopefully!

clm1996 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 0:23

ydi for being a pussy and not fitting back and for challeging him if u wasn't ready to fight back

SirJoseph 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 0:27

fitting?

zackkmann21 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 0:40

hahahaha loser

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my roommate started packing up for when we move out in August. Thirty boxes later, I realized she's leaving me with only a dishtowel and a skillet while she traipses through Europe for the summer. She even packed the silverware. And the curtains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 359

You deserved it 476

Today, I tried to nicely talk to my daughter about her rapid weight gain. Having a family history of weight-related illness, I felt it was necessary. I offered to get thyroid tests, teach her to buy healthy food, and start routine exercise. She told everyone I called her a cow and had fat-shamed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 192

The Top

Today, I sat and watched the CEO of DreamWorks on TV misuse words such as "quantum". He's filthy rich, whereas I'm a savagely underpaid gardener. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 162

You deserved it 5 905

Today, I just spent the last 3 years working on a research project and published about it, read by a multitude co-authors and proofreaders. My mum just spotted it has the word "asses" in it, instead of "assess". FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 242

Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 006

You deserved it 8 333

Today, I found out I’m pregnant. This would be joyful news, if the father wasn’t my friend’s soon-to-be husband. I’m one of the bridesmaids at their wedding tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 4 399

Today, my mother came up to me at swim meet and shouted to me in the bleachers "If you have to go potty, go now because there is a long line!". I'm seventeen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 879

You deserved it 3 275

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 322

You deserved it 38 506

Fight Club

Same thing different taste

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