xDpoohbear

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Xdpoohbear's favorite FMLs

By nick - 22/03/2009 00:06 - United States

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

agreeclassic 59 273

vote type 1 13 309

By Noname - 11/03/2009 05:21 - United States

Today, I had to get my hair chopped off for a role that I'm playing in a show. I was staring at the floor while the woman cut my hair, and I suddenly heard her start crying. Her tears were immediately followed by "It's okay! I have a friend in New York who can fix it. We won't charge you." FML

agreeclassic 81 553

vote type 1 3 823

By coffee - 22/08/2010 04:27 - United States

Today, while getting out of Starbucks there was a homeless guy. I bought him a coffee and he was so happy he gave me a hug. Guess whose wallet is missing? FML

agreeclassic 39 493

vote type 1 13 625

By ananomus - 22/08/2010 04:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

agreeclassic 35 252

vote type 1 5 935

Noobs

By Blueberrypicc - 13/08/2010 01:01 - United States

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

agreeclassic 33 372

vote type 1 38 150