Animals: Every day is Caturday - FML

Every day is Caturday

By Zoey_M - 08/07/2013 23:26 - Saudi Arabia - Riyadh

Today, my older brother told me that the only reason I like cats is because they control minds. I laughed. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 205

You deserved it 3 745

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Same thing different taste

By Christine - 09/05/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" In a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 993

You deserved it 51 193

By My rapey cat (doesn't even have balls) - 21/04/2018 01:30

Today, my 20-year-old sister is taking care of my cat while I am out of state. She sent a photo of him "playing in a silly way" with her kitty. I then had to very seriously explain to her that in the photo, my cat and her cat were trying to make more cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 189

You deserved it 424

By PO'd big bro - 13/01/2015 01:11 - United States - Toccoa

Today, I had to call a few different women and explain to them that my little brother had catfished them. I had to do it because he is mute and my parents were too busy screaming at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 014

You deserved it 2 277

Cats will be cats

By Seasoned Cat Veteran - 18/04/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, I'm watching my brother's cat while he's gone. I'm a seasoned cat veteran, having been around cats my whole life, but I never thought I would ever have to say, "Bob, why did you jump into the trashcan again?" with complete seriousness. This cat is WEIRD. And I've seen quite a few oddball cats before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 182

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 205

You deserved it 3 615

By Username - 29/07/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, my younger brother and I got into a fight over who the favorite child is. My mom overheard, came in the living room and said, "It's your little brother, now shut up." She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 326

You deserved it 7 347

By seriously - 24/05/2013 07:04 - United States

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 737

You deserved it 4 566

By Normal - 13/12/2009 04:39 - United States

Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 000

You deserved it 3 872

By hairless - 09/10/2011 03:53 - Canada

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 441

You deserved it 6 771

Still better than the Cats movie

By dirty deeds - 31/05/2020 14:00

Today, my brother’s cat pissed on my brand new bed. He refuses to replace the mattress, and claims it wasn’t his cat. We only have one cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 485

You deserved it 143

Next

Top comments

Aeroxx1337 17

Tuesday 9 July 2013 8:37

Cats can't control minds, that's ridiculous. A cat isn't making me type this. Please help.

Pwn17 25

Tuesday 9 July 2013 8:28

I can haz cheezburger... You gives it now... I commandz it.

Comments

clueless05 12

Tuesday 9 July 2013 10:04

Well, it's true! How else would they convince us to let them leave fur all over our houses and feed them?

kaynorr 9

Tuesday 9 July 2013 10:24

Are you my sister?

SrakaSrakasta 20

Tuesday 9 July 2013 11:29

Didn't you know that OP? Silly hooman.

Pordexel 5

Tuesday 9 July 2013 13:05

Cats can't control minds. They are our friendspleasehelpithasagun

petragirl 1

Tuesday 9 July 2013 13:52

Toxoplasma gondii, look it up. People who have it are more likely to have cats because it allows the parasite to complete its lifecycle.

redbandit9877 12

Tuesday 9 July 2013 15:30

You see? They already have you believing your brother is the crazy one. Well played cats, well played.

unixdude 9

Tuesday 9 July 2013 16:41

Jinn are totally real, but cats being mind readers is silly?

Grimnirwher9 21

Tuesday 9 July 2013 17:41

Well, he's not entirely wrong, although it's somewhat overstated. Scientists recently discovered that the fur of cats contains a substance that, when assimilated through your skin, as happens when petting a cat, releases endorfine and dopamine, making you feel happy. I suppose you could see this as a mild form of mind control.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 9 July 2013 19:06

yes, petting the pussy always makes me happy.

Omniprism 14

Tuesday 9 July 2013 19:00

Actually there is a study out there that cats can control their owners. He's a smart kid. Give him more credit.

Binglebeee 16

Tuesday 9 July 2013 19:23

Believe it or not, cats may actually release some form of pheramone that makes one change moods towards them. Apparently there were some tests done, but I dunno if it's actually true, something to think about though

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my crush let me know that he has a prom date. Obviously I'm supportive because I just want him to be happy, even if it's not me. I casually let him know that I'm going with someone else too, and now he's really mad about it. If he'd asked me before, I would've said yes. Like… Hello? How dare I get a prom date! FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 93

Today, I have a horribly painful throat infection and can't talk. In spite of this, Dad keeps insisting I call people for him, meaning I have to make use of a text to speech program. Eight out of twelve people I've called on his behalf have hung up, thinking I'm a scambot. Dad is blaming me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, after a lifetime of struggles, I was finally officially diagnosed with ADHD. Thanks to years of ridicule, punishments, humiliation and even beatings over something I literally could not control, I also have terrible depression and anxiety. My mom still thinks I’m making it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 238

You deserved it 206

Today, a customer asked a question I couldn’t answer. I asked if she would wait while I consulted someone else, but she spat in my face and stormed off. My manager saw, wrote me up for refusing to help, and gave the woman a gift card for her troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 009

You deserved it 244

Today, I got dragged along to a family dinner. Some idiot invited my douchebag vegan uncle, who spent half the night making condescending remarks and lecturing us on how disgusting it was to have steak on offer at the table. A fistfight eventually erupted, and the cops were called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 701

You deserved it 3 982

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 994

You deserved it 2 885

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 591

You deserved it 9 069

Today, I sobbed hard to the point of hyperventilating and throwing up. Why? I instinctually stomped on a roach but didn’t see the egg sack she was carrying. I feel like I murdered a mom and her babies. I feel awful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 892