That's not how depression works. And that's one of the worst things to tell to someone who got one. Depression is a mental disease, people who are unlucky enough to have it need professional help to cure. Guilt them — how OP dare being sad after her mom died ??!!!! — is nonsense who can only make things worst.

If you don't know about depression or nutrition, don't talk about depression or nutrition, instead of giving bad advices.

The split is because Group A) Believes you have responsibility for how you react to things that happen in your life, and you need to get your shit together and stop spiraling. Group B) Belieives that you have less responsibility, you are fates victim and society/guy/boss are at fault for not being decent human beings when OP could clearly use some support.

Eating your depression isn’t healthy. We all have a responsibility to keep our own bodies healthy. Like right now, I did the dumb during depression and let myself go. Now I’m manning up (even though my wife doesn’t care) and changing my habits to lose weight because i was irresponsible in what I put in my body. It goes far beyond me though. It affects sex, which isn’t fair to her, and it affects what I can do, how much energy ai have, plus reeks havoc on my body, causing more health issues, which in turn will affect my wife more due to the extra stress it will put on her, and it ultimately boils down to: No one forced all that junk down my throat except me. I cannot blame others for how I treated my body, but because of my actions, I’m not the only one to suffer consequences of what I did. And I don’t want to keel over due to the extra health I caused myself and leave my wife to fend for herself. I can only blame myself for what I did, and ultimately, i’m responsible for getting back into shape. Which I’m now saying no to sweets, carbs, and being lazy. I will have to sacrifice and sweat and struggle, but I’ll be doing it for the greater good of my health, my wife and our future. So she deserves whatever consequences it causes, but like all consequences of what you do, you are also solely responsible for fixing the damage you do to your own body. These days people rush to blame others, but refuse to accept responsibility for their own actions. A result of the “if it feels good, do it” generation. Of which I’m a part of. No one but myself made me fat. It’s up to me to accept my lumps and fix it. No one else. And I’ll struggle and fall sometimes, but to get that off my body, my organs and joints will thank me. Especially since I’m getting back surgery next week. Looking forward to hitting therapy and getting back on a bike.