Sex, Cars and Intimacy: Cramped

Cramped

By chelse_elyce - 21/01/2015 04:10 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 824

You deserved it 13 360

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 16:46 - United Kingdom - Loughton

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 815

You deserved it 3 838

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 137

You deserved it 4 018

Life imitates bad art

By sex sent me to the Er - 15/10/2019 14:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 2 118

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 946

You deserved it 6 529

By Clumsy Clumsy - 16/04/2016 16:27 - Canada - Spruce Grove

Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 482

You deserved it 3 242

Alexa, play "Let's Get it On" by Marvin Gaye

By notsosexy - 18/07/2020 08:01

Today, I attempted to have amazing birthday sex with my boyfriend in his dorm room. Everything was going great until we tried switching positions. I hit my head so hard on the bunk above his bed that I gave myself a concussion, and blacked out. Needless to say, the moment was ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 333

By dinosaur - 10/01/2011 10:35 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 215

You deserved it 3 204

By neckcrack - 07/09/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 206

You deserved it 24 077

By Ouch - 25/04/2011 19:31 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 740

You deserved it 20 684

By WellOops - 18/07/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend crashed his car while I was giving him road head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 663

You deserved it 9 639

False_Stupidity 41

Wednesday 21 January 2015 16:11

Just explain that you were extra... horny! Also, you must be a real knockout, or your boyfriend is anyhow...

nikkipettyfer 24

Wednesday 21 January 2015 16:07

I'm sure you'll laugh about it later, OP!

Comments

BBeffedmylife 28

Wednesday 21 January 2015 19:54

At least it didn't end with a McDonald's bag..

lazyslumber 18

Wednesday 21 January 2015 20:17

The back seat is a better bet

CaliCassanova 14

Wednesday 21 January 2015 21:03

First comment was inspired by god! Holy writings!! Hahahah

Bazinga90 12

Wednesday 21 January 2015 21:08

It's happened to the best of us, ok well maybe not that, but car sex can be awkward. Lol.

emilyg2014 14

Wednesday 21 January 2015 23:32

Is it so hard to at least slide over to the passenger side? The back? Goodness. Have fun explaining that to a doctor. XD

GunSlinger69 19

Wednesday 21 January 2015 23:41

Aw bad luck, but hopefully you feel better soon. And hey, in 10 years time this will be a great story to tell your kids!

ToxicMoo33 18

Thursday 22 January 2015 0:43

I laughed so hard oh my god

drangler 2

Thursday 22 January 2015 1:32

You gotta use the passenger seat or get a jeep and do it in the back haha

devi_916 39

Thursday 22 January 2015 4:06

That's happened to me and I know how much it sucks. FYL OP.

chelse_elyce 11

Thursday 22 January 2015 7:58

I feel your pain lmao

pizzafrommars 14

Thursday 22 January 2015 4:28

But that ass tho.

Keywords

Public freakouts Education Parents Mother in law Love Argument AITA Miscellaneous Fear Insects Skincare Health Cats Jealousy Work Gross Coworkers Drugs Dogs Animals Fire Awkward Scams Transportation Cars Money Bikes Scary Neighbours Sex

The Top

Today, I had dinner with my girlfriend of five months along with my mom and dad. It all was going fine until my mom asked aloud, "Everything going smooth for you in the bedroom?" to which my girlfriend replied, "No." I'd actually been painting the master bedroom at my parent's house for some extra cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 440

You deserved it 4 299

Today, I was supposed to be working from home. Instead, I ended up taking the kids out to the park for the morning, because my wife “couldn’t even” today. When we got home, she had demolished two bottles of wine, and was masturbating to a home improvement show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 982

You deserved it 312

The Top

Today, I walked into work, and the first question my boss asks me is "Are those your pajamas?" I was wearing my favorite outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 893

You deserved it 9 488

Today, my wife had our first child. He's identical to her coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 130

Today, I realised that if I died, no one would care. I know this because when I called my partner distressed last night, he told me he needed to sleep and hung up in less than 45 seconds, and a friend told me to call lifeline. I haven’t heard from either of them since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 187

Today, I accidentally shut the door on someone who was walking behind me. After he opened the door, I turned, looked him sincerely in the eye and said, "Suffering". I meant to say sorry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 960

You deserved it 1 998

Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 747

You deserved it 8 350

Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143 502

You deserved it 9 017