Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend of 3 years in his living room when a girl barges in, sees us, and screams, "I knew it!" then rushes out. My boyfriend gets up, grabs his pants, and, while chasing after her, yells, "Baby, she's nothing, you know I only love you!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 months and I were in the middle of a heavy make-out session when his cell rang. Normally, he'd ignore it. This time however he pushed me off of him and said "Shit! It's probably my girlfriend!" I thought I was his girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in the middle of great sex when he suddenly called out his ex's name. Just before I decided to yell at him and throw him out of my room, I realised he performed better when he yelled her name. So, I let him. FML
Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
Today, while in bed with my boyfriend of 2 years, he mentioned what it would be like if he had sex with anyone other than me. I mentioned the same about him. He quickly yelled, "No, you're a woman. You are mine!" FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
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Top comments
NayaBayBeee 0
Dump Him. That sucks OP. Punch him in the balls when and if you see him again(:
Quest_ 13
Oh, man. **** your life. I don't even know what to say.
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Comments (107)
ChristopheRig 0
IM so so sooo sorry, the guy is an ass hole
wtsyrfce 0
i can't believe someone would do that. it's so... I don't know, hurtfull
Skeeter013 5
I'd beat him with a baseball bat.
kaia_williamson 0
what a douche
mystic_star 0
damn sounds like you're the "other woman".
jussjess 0
Oh dang....guys are fun, yeah? :/
afg3 0
jerk face
tdurden 0
I dont blame him. who would want to be with a girl who refers to sex as "having it off" WTF does that mean? good for him, you were probably a lame duck anyway
sin211 0
haha
Karnezar 2
Well, you're in his livingroom, and he ran out. Might as well steal as much shit as you can and leave. :3
gorgeousnightmar 0
totally random I'm almost 21 and I LOVE Justin bieber. he is amazing. haters are just jealous. you cannot say you dint know or have listened to at least 3 songs. and sorry for you op!!