haha

First


OP that sucks. at least yoi didnt die

actually thatll be a higlight for me on eventful days as well srsly how coooooll

3rd this 

You're not first, you fail! You even replied to #1so its impossible for you to be first! Please vanish into the internet wasteland, never to return!

FYL

5 people
mightve just commented before us T.T look at the time sometimes and 2 mightve mention first to reply to the comment

today I sneezed, t-boned a car, then which hit some other cars, and I tried to explain to the guy what happened, but he was a total prick about it and posted it to a website.
FML

Bahahahahaha! epic!

Still the other driver's fault, sneeze or no sneeze.

today my gf was giving me road head and I t-boned a car, which hit some other cars. I told my gf to say she sneezed but I don't think anyone believed her because she still had jizz on her mouth. fml

Known fact you can't keep your eyes open when you sneeze. I think that defense should hold up in court.

lol I snezzed too while reading this!! haha!! fml!!

Aww dat sounds horrible FML. I was in a similar situation and i have pics of my car . U can see it here:

http://tinyurl.com/ylb8evy

aahhahahah sucks for you

hohoho yes! that might be the funniest excuse I've heard in a while. we'll at least you're ok.

OP: Yah and now my shotgun is about to sneeze all over you 0_0

Did you say bless you? :)

@29 - I think she'd have more than that in her mouth. Did anyone see "The world according to Garp"???

I like saying "t-boned". That should be a sex position so people can share stories of how they got t-boned.

at least he helped u outta the car

I love John Irving! The World According to Garp was about a woman giving head to her boyfriend, and her husband pulls in and rear ends the car. This severely injures the woman and boyfriend, and there is no denying the affair after a trip to the hospital. John Irving is so quirky like that! :)

are you stupid slice of life? its the drivers responsibility to maintain control of the car AT ALL TIMES NO MATTER WHAT. sneeze or no sneeze their fault!! unless the op ran a stop or red light then it's their fault.

I don't often ackowledge that fml's suck, but a guy driving a pick-up outside an elementary school, whilst picking up his own kid, sneezed, hit the sidewalk and drove a 12 year old girl into a chain link fence. so yea, as crazy as it sounds, it happens.

#1. stfu and say something usefull instead of trying to be first.

you must drive a shitty, small "environmentally friendly" car. ydi for trying to be environmentally friendly but actually falling for corporate lies. fact: Toyota priuses have nickel batteries and just mining for them alone is worse then owning and drving a fleet of hummers.

"That sneeze cost you 10 years worth of pay asshole."

How are you first, you replied to the first comment?

Hahahah that's really funny :)

give the guy a brake! he sneezed

Fuckin hancock...

yeah i sneezed three times in a row (eyes closed), and rear ended the prius in front of me. 4,000 dollars. well i guess that's just part of my anti-prius campaign, yes?

I did the same thing... but I hit a BMW. bc I sneezed I didn't get a ticket bc "it's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open"

dang that sucks. i've always had a phobia of sneezing whilst driving :S

18, watch Mythbusters sometime. Adam Savage successfully proved that not only can you sneeze with your eyes open, but your eyes won't pop out of their sockets if they are open while you sneeze! I've placed at least 692 people under citizens arrest for making lame ass excuses that were busted on that show.

I've heard that several times before, but for some reason I can sneeze with my eyes open. It made me think that it was a myth. :/

49, Adam had to use both hands to hold his eyes open. Would you rather people completely let go of the wheel?

You can use your elbows, forearms, or knee to drive. As long as you're not in a sports car taking a turn at 80 mph, one of my aforementioned methods would work. Your foot works the brake pedal, so using an alternate steering method for only a second or 2 wouldn't be a problem, as sneezes only last a second.

Most of the time a sneeze is unexpected. It takes more than a second to succesfully revert to knees or elbows while driving and hold your eyes open when your not even expecting it. Using your logic it would possibly cause more accidents.

I agree it takes more than a second for elbows or forearms, but I can lift my knee up an inch or 2 to the wheel in less than half a second. And I don't know about you guys, but I can almost always feel a sneeze coming on between 1-3 seconds before it happens. Maybe most people don't feel one coming on?

I either feel it coming a mile away, or it's instantaneous. Even with your eyes beig held open, if you sneeze multiple times in a row you'd probably be so disoriented that it wouldn't matter.

^^^ that's when you say banana or something random to prevent the next sneeze! But I somehow feel like that worked better when I was a kid...*sigh*

lmao @ 49, my thoughts exactly. I watched that episode the other day!

knisbby, shut up. A sneeze can often come at unpredictable times. it's very careless to drive with elbows or knees because the sneeze could cause your body to jolt, moving the wheel and causing a bigger wreck. how about you just brake when you sneeze?

knibbsy if I recall correct he had to pry his eyes opened to keep them from closing. but really nice try

Adam uses both of his hands to hold his eyes open. You could get your hands in that position in a second. And as I said before, me and my roommates I've just spoken with can always feel a sneeze coming at least a second or 2 before. 75, a sneeze won't jolt you so much as to be unable to use your knee to keep the car straight for a few seconds, epic fail. And if that were true and it did jolt you that much, how you do figure braking would be safe since the jolt may cause you to slam the brakes and lock the wheels up?

Erm use 1 hand and keep the other on the wheel. Only need 1 eye to see :)

Yeah, I'm very allergic and usually if I sneeze once, I'll end up sneezing 5-10 more times. So while I'm sneezing my lungs out, I dot think it's a great idea to drive with my knees/elbows for that long a time.

#53 closing your eyes is just a natural response, and can be trained away. I've sneezed, kept my eyes (partially) open, and still had my hands on the wheel before, it just takes practice.

#4 not really lol

D:..... stupid anti flood thing. arghh still can't post now I can I think..

Thank goodness for that anti-flood, or you'd be even more annoying Giddy.

I call this fake. how the hell did u hit 5 parked cars??

It's mexico. They drive pintos n shit.

yes but also a car brand also

Type of car. At least I think I spelled It right. They're old mexican cars that fall apart after 1000 miles. By the way, you no respond to my message?!

^^ they are beans. I was in Cancun for spring break last year and rented a pinto. Now I know how Cinderella felt in her pumpkin - you ever try driving a giant hollowed out vegetable? They smell bad, get awful gas mileage, and aren't very safe to drive. Next time, I'll at least rent a raspberry, I hear they're coming in style this year.

did I? WTF lol

yes master my apologies...

Actually the Pinto was an American car from the 60's and 70's. Made notorious because the gas tank was placed far in the rear of the car, making them prone to rupture during rear end collisions and possibly burst into flames. So like all our hazardous stuff, we move the manufacturing to another country (Mexico).

My husband's 1st car was a baby blue pinto in 1985. He never had tailgaters thank God!

That Garp movies... wasn't that Robin Williams and some transexual nurse? I barely remember it cause it was kinda boring wouldn't you say? Wow not even a blowjob in the car jogs my memory.

Blow job In that movie. Haha, that sounded bad after I reread it.

especially from a t-bone. this is obviously fake!

they have cars in Mexico?? since when did this happen?

lolz

mostly rentals from the American tourists.

Be warned, the cars in Mexico (Cancun at least) aren't of good quality. Refer to post 54 for clarification.

Since capitalism exists.

Flip him off. That totally suckss haha

hahahahaha what i priceless reaction! if i ever do something stupid, im just gonna blame it on a sneeze :P

Rofl. Well that's one expensive sneeze... lol. Sorry for your car OP. Yesterday I had to sneeze and almost ran into a ditch... the glare of the sun off another car can really just run you down.

haha yeah I can totally see the judge do a /facepalm... lol

Would you rather for him to have said, "Sorry, I was texting someone"? Being in a collision is awful but his insurance should take care of it. Have fun car shopping.

What difference does that make? They're both equally retarded excuses. Sneezing takes less than a second. No way that's what really caused the accident, unless the driver has a special strand of idiot in his DNA.

But at least sneezing is involuntary. I'd rather feel my car is totalled because the other driver is an uncoordinated idiot and not just reckless.

Once again, sneezing takes less than a second. It is not so involuntary that you lose control of your car enough to T-bone a car and damage five others.