Intimacy: BFF

BFF

By imabadperson - 06/03/2010 12:24 - United States

Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML

agreeclassic 9 526

vote type 1 44 558

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By Partners - 22/06/2015 19:55 - United States - Alpharetta

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

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By Is_This_Real - 13/09/2016 02:34 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I hooked up with a friend. I expressed an interest in it becoming something more. He expressed an interest in not telling anyone and pretending it never happened. FML

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By Foot In Mouth - 13/07/2016 02:46 - United States - Bentonville

Today, while meeting a new client, their assistant said I looked familiar. Before my brain could stop me, I blurted out, "I do porn." FML

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True faith

By csor027 - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was having a good talk with a coworker and I was excited that I've made my first friend at work. After sharing some stories and some laughs he asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do. He asked if I was always faithful, I said I was. He then walked away. FML

agreeclassic 35 004

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By Anonymous - 30/03/2016 06:53 - United States - Manchester

Today, I introduced my long-distance boyfriend of 2 years to my friends. I told him how my friends jokingly call him my imaginary Internet boyfriend. He thought it was so funny that when they met, he claimed to be my cousin, saying that I paid him to pretend to be my boyfriend. They believed him. FML

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By Anonymous - 28/09/2009 16:28 - United States

Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML

agreeclassic 45 796

vote type 1 4 100

Classic

By Anonymous - 05/07/2021 01:59

Today, my boyfriend introduced me as a friend to one of his friends. FML

agreeclassic 1 068

vote type 1 138

By kat - 21/02/2012 09:53 - Reserved

Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML

agreeclassic 27 745

vote type 1 3 061

By backtosquareone - 04/10/2009 09:42 - Canada

Today, after weeks of therapy for severe depression, my therapist thought it would be helpful to confess my deepest problems to my friends, to prove that it was alright to trust people. I did. They laughed. Hard. FML

agreeclassic 45 553

vote type 1 4 013

By augiedd - 05/03/2014 02:46 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

agreeclassic 45 853

vote type 1 7 465

wanijima 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 19:59

I do things like that sometimes, but joking about an awkward subject to try and make things less awkward? Uh... YDI, imo.

narcoticjunkie 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 20:01

hello, I'm a drug addict.

Comments

mr_miyagi 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 21:12

YDI for joking about addiction. It has destroyed countless families and lives. bitch

blueeyes24 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 21:33

^this.... try finding a family that hasn't had to deal with some form of addiction. if yours hasn't you are lucky. Never cool to joke about!

smashleighfig 0

Monday 8 March 2010 1:49

88 you sound like your hiding your crack ***** of a mothers problem. Dont be afraid to let those skeletons out of the closet ;)

mama2b3 20

Saturday 6 March 2010 21:13

who does that? YDI

frannnyyyyy 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 21:27

WTF? why would you do that to break the ice? that just makes people feel awkward...

tbe99 2

Saturday 6 March 2010 21:33

Because serious addictions are oh so funny. YDI, ******* moron.

cant7see7me7 3

Saturday 6 March 2010 22:13

hahahahaha I love saying akward shit to new people just it hasn't backfired yet haha

uxoriouswidow 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 22:13

Isn't having a **** addiction just being horny with no better outlet?

this_one 2

Saturday 6 March 2010 22:14

You're a bad person.

g0o0_dj 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 23:13

hahahahahahaha wow smart :)

canzo378 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 23:14

ummm... why in the world would you introduce yourself as a sex addict???

pr0adam 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 23:24

you are stupid I should have sex with u and punch u in the face

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I'd had it with my mom's addiction to weed, so I told her to choose between me or the weed. I'm currently looking on Craigslist for an apartment. FML

agreeclassic 40 051

vote type 1 14 081

Nice.

agreeclassic 258

vote type 1 97

Today, I found out that my son and his stepdad have bonded over covering for each others' misbehaviour so I don’t find out. Between them they have kept it secret that my son sneaks out at 1am to see his secret girlfriend, that my husband lost £500 gambling, that my son scratched the car… The list goes on. FML

agreeclassic 408

vote type 1 119

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

agreeclassic 54 515

vote type 1 4 196

Today my daughter asked me to do her a huge favor : undergo a liposuction transplantation where my fat would be sucked out then put into her butt and thighs. Apparently, I am the fattest DNA match to her, lessening the risk of her rejecting the transplant. FML

agreeclassic 11 697

vote type 1 1 182

Today, I saw a guy struggling to reach something on the top shelf at the grocery store. Wanting to be helpful, I said, “Need a tall person’s help?” He laughed, stepped aside, then his girlfriend, who was taller than both of us, grabbed the item with zero effort. She gave me the dirtiest look, as if I’d personally insulted his manhood. FML

agreeclassic 191

vote type 1 351

BFF

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