Miscellaneous: A blessing and a curse

A blessing and a curse

By yarenis - 24/12/2013 10:45 - United States - Gardner

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees". For some reason, everybody pronounces it "your anus". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 177

You deserved it 5 881

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Same thing different taste

By Nico - 12/11/2011 15:42 - France

Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 819

You deserved it 3 670

I'm a meme

By karen - 27/09/2019 14:00

Today, as always, my name is Karen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 654

You deserved it 401

By Anonymous - 25/03/2018 19:00

Today, my girlfriend named our daughter Aspen. Ass. Pen. When I hear her name I will always think of a pen in a butthole. No doubt her future classmates will too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 891

You deserved it 1 471

By Anonymous - 26/01/2015 23:24 - Sweden - Huddinge

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-worker's anus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 940

You deserved it 3 132

Confused

By Anonymous - 25/07/2017 00:30

Today, after 26 years of confusion with my parents pronouncing it different ways, and in my mom's case, multiple ways, having to clear up how it's spelled every time I meet someone, I asked my mom how to pronounce my name. She got mad and then pronounced it three different ways while explaining. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 514

You deserved it 435

By rainydays79 - 23/01/2010 19:12 - United States

Today, I realized that I am the only one among my group of friends who names their bowel movements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 431

You deserved it 60 036

Unforgettable

By Edward - 09/12/2021 13:59

Today, I realized that since I was in elementary school, my friends, my workmates, and even my family, all call me accidentally by someone else's name instead of my actual name. I'm 30 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 143

By kiki - 05/08/2010 18:24 - United States

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 344

You deserved it 3 876

Rip Torn

By Beackers675 - 10/05/2022 02:00

Today, I tore my ass crack. No, not my asshole, my ass crack. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just know it hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 103

By Anonymous - 14/06/2019 00:01

Today, I gave my name for a lunch order, I even spelled it out for the cashier. When my food was ready, they screamed "Labia," in the restaurant full of people. My name is Nadia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 829

You deserved it 147

FellowYellow 10

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:05

Ouch OP! Guess your parents wouldn't think it would bother you whenever you hear someone go "Hey how's Yarenis?" Change your name if you want to!

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:06

I know what you're going through. My name is "Yeraneediot".

Comments

Uhhhidk 3

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:53

Well at least there's not many of you yarenis'.

naznafeathers 22

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:56

Honestly, I'd pronounce it "yair-niss"

olpally 32

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:57

Just change your name, that's awful. Or accept it for what it is and laugh it off.

VicRC 7

Tuesday 24 December 2013 16:59

Troll parents! Shows how much they loved you at birth

Readoll 13

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:02

For some reason?..

Credibleskills 28

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:13

I recommend getting getting a name change tbh

domolovesyoshi 33

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:15

I got it right before I read your explanation of how it's pronounced

sickerthanyou 13

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:17

Nice to meet you your anus

swagswagswagz 3

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:21

Now you know how Uranus feels.

JoJo91_fml 8

Tuesday 24 December 2013 17:38

Aw some people are just assholes LOL, especially if they already know that's not how to pronounce your name

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The Top

Today, the final for a class I'm in is taught by a decrepit old man who apparently has a flunk-out reputation. He spent the entire previous class making a study guide for the final exam, emphasizing, "THIS is on the exam. Know THIS." I studied it hard. Absolutely none of it was on the exam. Everyone failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 509

You deserved it 83

Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, maintenance was supposed to come in to replace my broken washer. I worked late last night until 4 AM, and then dozed off. I slept so soundly that they managed to enter the apartment, haul away the broken washer, and install the new one, all while I was fast asleep in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 184

Today, after spending the three previous nights cursing the noisiest bird alive that continually disrupts my sleep to the point where I just want to smash the damn thing's head in with a rock, I realised it's been my pedestal fan the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 460

You deserved it 32 227

Today, my little brother gave me an open jar of peanut butter for my birthday. I'm deathly allergic, and he knows it. Despite his maniacal grin and snickering, my parents said it was an innocent mistake, and grounded me for yelling at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 638

You deserved it 3 675

Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 314

You deserved it 3 578

Today, my boyfriend was blowing his nose when out of nowhere he started laughing and said, “hey, my nose is exactly like you in bed, I have to finish if off with my finger to get the job done.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 914

You deserved it 301

Today, at work, someone found a bat indoors. I offered my help. They shouted, "Let someone with the right expertise do it." I volunteer as a bat carer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 111