Today, I was using the restroom at a gas station when someone hurriedly knocked on the door. Thinking that it was my sister, I playfully said, "Hold up, hoe!" I opened the door to see a goth woman with an edgy haircut giving me a death stare. FML
by Watsausrname / 06/13/2016 at 10:31pm / Miscellaneous
Mauskau's comment : I would've just laughed it off. Doesn't matter if it was my sister or not, hoes gotta hold up and wait for their turn.
by staciefacecat / 06/13/2016 at 9:03pm / Love
by whygod / 06/12/2016 at 9:45am / Miscellaneous
nattnatt73's comment : Oh wow, that's child pornography. Sounds like she needs therapy
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML
by Welpthatwasfast / 06/10/2016 at 3:57am / Intimacy
Tripartita's comment : Then a nearby game of hide and seek breaks out, adding to the confusion when the seeker shouts, "ready or not, here I come!"
by . / 08/05/2016 at 12:57pm / Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz) / Intimacy
by snazz23 / 08/05/2016 at 11:58am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Marteeny / 06/08/2016 at 11:14pm / Miscellaneous
by radiantum13 / 06/08/2016 at 10:33pm / Work
Today, I was on a first date at a bar, when a girl walks over and ask me if I'm a doctor. I said yes, thinking she overheard me talking about my PhD. The girl then showed me a lump on her breast and asked what to do about it. My date then slapped me and left. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
by Anonymous / 06/07/2016 at 3:45am / Love