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Today, I went to the movies with my crush, who had asked me out on a date. Assuming he'd pay, I left my money at home. When the time came to buy the tickets, he only bought one for himself. FML

#20448091
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24954) - you deserved it (66269)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous001 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I drove in heavy rain for the first time, by myself. I had been told to drive below the speed limit, and be extra careful of the cars around me. Nobody had told me about thunder scaring a cow that would then escape from the corral and hit my car. FML

#21488178
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24954) - you deserved it (1642)

On 11/03/2015 at 10:24pm - animals - by damaged - United States (California)

Today, I let my on-again, off-again boyfriend spend the night. For months we had been fighting about his new flame. After he convinced me that they are no longer an item, we had the most mind-blowing sex then we fell asleep. I awoke to him moaning her name. Followed by pelvic thrusts. FML

#2940444
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (52607)

On 06/16/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML

#18093581
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (2787)

On 10/28/2011 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

#21298539
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (7289)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:04pm - misc - by Jakeok (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML

#18782870
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24949) - you deserved it (2314)

On 01/12/2012 at 5:14am - work - by me_the_maniak - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I overheard a conversation between a coworker and a new employee. The new girl was trying to get familiar with people's names, and she asked my coworker, "Which one is Heather?" He answered, "The annoying one." She said, "Oh, that's Heather." I'm Heather. FML

#13625422
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24948) - you deserved it (7987)

On 10/28/2010 at 10:19am - work - by kaz89 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my Canadian friend at the airport. As we were heading into the city, I told him not to worry about all the US stereotypes and that gun crime in my city is rare. A few hours later, we witnessed a guy get shot in the street in broad daylight. Now he's too scared to leave the house. FML

#21464468
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24944) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/04/2015 at 10:30am - misc - by fuckyoudeadgunnuts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

#20038307
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24946) - you deserved it (1633)

On 08/23/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I saw my ex for the first time since we broke up. We were on a train next to each other for 6 hours, to a festival where our tents were pitched next to each other. We're here for 5 days. FML

#21462968
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24943) - you deserved it (2259)

On 08/31/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by NoFunForMe - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

#1246949
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24942) - you deserved it (88743)

On 04/23/2009 at 1:44am - health - by tgstreaks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I found out that my fiancé's parents are refusing to pay for a honeymoon because "they didn't have one so neither will we", so they won't pay for a single thing for our wedding. FML

#8279191
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24941) - you deserved it (14881)

On 02/15/2010 at 12:03am - love - by tayluh26 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

#19289453
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24940) - you deserved it (13042)

On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland



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