Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, I was stopped in traffic when a woman rear-ended me, backed up, and sped off along the shoulder, taking my passenger side mirror with her. FML
Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, a car hit me. I didn't get hurt, but someone called 911. The old woman who had hit me got out of the car with no problem to look at me, and gets back into the car. When the police arrive, she pulls out crutches and said I made strange faces and made her hit me. I got blamed. FML
Today, my mother sued me for whiplash in a car accident that was her fault. She screamed to stop so I slammed on the brakes and the car behind ran into us. It wasn't an emergency; she just thought she saw her friend at the bus stop. It wasn't even her. FML
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML
Today, I got rear-ended at a stop sign on a seldom used road in my neighborhood. As I open my car door to trade insurance information with the guy, he backs up a little and speeds away, taking my car door with him. FML
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Top comments
OGReaper 2
wow you are a coward.
vashthestampede 0
Mother used ROAR! Wild OP ran away!
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Comments (265)
OGReaper 2
wow you are a coward.
rallets 23
what a pussy
Lanceeden 12
I literally facepalmed when I saw you were a guy.
DaFudge 6
More like a little bitch.
hatesfate 6
YDI - next time tell her to shut the **** up and let her daughter handle the adult situation she put herself in or you're calling the cops for a hit and run.
skullcandifiedDJ 5
you might as well have gave her a foot massage and hand her a 100 dollar bill for having to waste her time... you need man up
rallets 23
who?
ikickgingers 15
Ahh i got hit by a lady turning out of a parking lot last year. She turned out and went across two lanes and hit my car. She was scary as shittttttt and had 100lbs on me. Maybe I'm a pussy?? I let the cops get her info and waited for the print out. :/
humorizer 14
@18: That's the problem. If he were a female, he wouldn't have to worry about being hit in the happy sacks. In this case, there was an actual chance of instant incapacitation.
armorf0r 7
Why were you driving in a kitchen?
armorf0r 7
Ahhh, I guess i deserved that to be moderated. I wanted a flame war!
66mustangrocks 4
Wow dude your a little bitch. I woulda been up in her face yelling back about her daughters shitty driving
nalia18 8
DUDE!!! rip off the panties and put some big boy boxers on!!!
g0bak3acake 0
Canada already had a bad name
QuisMysterium 4
I'm hoping OP at least got the plate number. But seriously, why do as she said? smh
StoryOfTheYear 15
She knew the password, eh?
Drummerboy1234 0
Idk about y'all, but I've had the same experience. only, as soon as I got out of my car, the girl yelled at me to stay inside, and attempting to take a pic of the plates, she hit me. interesting how they were both women...
dyble95 0
It doesn't matter if it's a girl or a boy. Both should be held to the same standards on this. Op should of stood up for himself and if the situation escalated then he should of called the cops and got out of there If it got worse but not just because a mom was yelling though!
kettlemen 1
Nobody says happy sacks anymore
maj28 0
didn't I see this on bud light commercial? man up.
danishbagel 3
OP needs to nut up or shut up.
tjv3 10
that's when you get out the cell phone and call the police .... oh and you are a wimp
lickmychode 3
Judging by your avatar and tattoo, you are a giant douche.
Unabletuna 6
Get that bitch a ticket Bitches love tickets
lexa1love 16
Ya, that's why I carry a gun. :) Should have called the cops to get her information.
hombrepollo 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ur wet cotton ( the softest thing on earth)
hombrepollo 0
I apologize for my unfunny comment I am ashamed for filling the comment page with such bad jokes
Lanceeden 12
Why did the chicken cross the road?
LaughinStock 16
It's ok 17 the Internet won't forgive you, but I will :D
StoryOfTheYear 15
17- Damn bro, that's the best recovery I've ever seen. No joke. *thumbs up second comment*
RA661 8
*pitty thumbs*
Savra_fml 17
# 33, bacause your dick was stuck in it.
mrosew442 10
nope, the softest thing on earth is a chinchilla. I am being totally serious.
Miss_Kristen 10
That sucks, but you gotta stand up for yourself
Aakash04 0
u look cute lolol
ThreeSheetsGone 12
You look like a douchebag. This ain't E-Harmony bro.
yankfan89 27
Seriously stand up for yourself. You let this lady get away with a hit and run, basically
frostyman211 2
no he's a pussy
frostyman211 2
no he's a pussy
nollid7 5
Can we say pussy!
fthku 13
Spustit'sya! Nope, can't say it. I can say get down in russian though, apparently.
cmayo 3
Smart mom.
XxREXxX 0
*cough*cough* bit*h *cough*cough*
ObsessedWithMe 13
complete truth
frostyman211 2
UR A PUSSY
crazygurlzz1 5
Haha i know right?! That would so be me!
vashthestampede 0
Mother used ROAR! Wild OP ran away!
Falassalond 16
This made me laugh out loud! Thanks!
StoryOfTheYear 15
You make anyone who has played a Pokemon game proud.
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
Damn, that was like the best comment ever simply because it was a Pokèmon reference :'D Good job
zoezola 0
win
Glitterhinoceros 14
It was super effective
KnewPerdomo 4
roar can't be super effective.. sheesh..
sematariux 7
Lol @199's avatar Perfect for this situation
khaya 9
You should of said "I'm gonna pop the trunk on your hitch ass!".
leadman1989 16
And then she pops hers. Now she's holding a sawed off twenty gauge and he's holding his umbrella. :p
somethinorother 0
You just made my day
rigger61 0
did you go buy some tampons after that?
Omgplz 3
If he/she went to go buy some tampons then they'd be "on their period", thus making them ten times as bitchy and hostile as the mother. Your argument is invalid.
je_suis_fml 11
never mind technicalities in a JOKE.. the gist is: he's acting like a woman by having his balls handed to him, but I'm sure your comprehension skills led you to that conclusion before you posted your bitchy comment... or not. Chill out, all jokes aren't based on actual "facts". grr
versc 0
Run bitch run she's gonna eat ur soul
kalbrek009 20
That's when you say...."oh, I'm sorry my car was in the way of a girl who drives like her mother, now shut the f up & get back in your f'ing car while I call the police to report her for hitting my car, & you for threatening me bitch!"...then take a pic of the car license plate w/your phone & drive off while dialing 911 & tell the operator you're being chased by a psycho who has already hit your car.
bjulie1998 5
Uh, dude, weren't you just telling a different OP off for wanting to have sex with his girlfriend? And you think this is better? Wow, get your priorities straight. And seriously, would you really say that. NO, you would politly tell her you only want insurance info, get it then walk away. I don't know single person in the world who would say that. You must be ******* crazy.
armorf0r 7
10 - Cool story bro. Tell it again.
tsim_fml 0
47- well actualy theres about 30 people here right now that'd probably do that, myself included
Llama_Face89 34
I'd do it just to see the look on her face!
ProjeKtSC2 8
Your the guy that just admitted to stalking your own daughter... Why would anyone take your advice haha..
zoezola 0
i definitely think i would say that. it made me laugh so hard! just the thought of someone doing that makes my day
DHoffmann 9
Yeah man, you should probably change your profile picture or something because a good majority of people on here now know you as that man who stalks his daughter to shit, and we can't take any of your comments seriously. I can't, anyways.
Xquisite1 28
You were more pussy than the both of them put together.