Today, I found a used condom in my trash can. I have been happily married to my wife for 7 years, and we use other forms of birth control. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a used condom and wrapper in the bathroom trash can at my girlfriends house. The condom is not a brand I've ever used. She lives alone. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
Today, after having gone off the pill a couple of weeks ago, I finally got my old friskiness back only to find part of a condom wrapper in my husband's pocket. Turns out he was impatient and went elsewhere. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML
Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML
Today, my boyfriend confided to me that he has a used condom collection. When I reacted with disgust, he "reassured" me that he only keeps the ones he uses with me. FML
Today, I went in for a routine check up. I also found out I have an incurable STD and that I’m pregnant. I’ve been married to my husband for 7 years and have never had sex with anyone else in my entire life. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
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Top comments
Xx_Nikky_xX 4
Surprise!
steve412 0
Don't be quick to assume things. You'll make things worse.
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Comments (280)
Xx_Nikky_xX 4
Surprise!
cobaltss06 1
Cheating bitch!! Get her back and put a used condom on her pillow just make sure her best friend helps you use it
JJambiya21 0
Well maybe if you had kids 5 or 6 years before you were married, than maybe the condom wasn't hers. Or if she dosnt own a vibrator she may have used some object and put a condom over it? Either way don't jump to conclusions of her cheating.
xStaciexLynnx 15
I think a used condom is usually defined by having some evidence left inside that would not be there if she used a vibrator or other object with it.
SecretMe00 5
Omg she could actually be faithful! It could be a neighbors, or some random ass person that decided to dump it off there. OP just talk to your wife!
spekledworf 18
68- my vibrator doesn't ****... :O
OffToTheGayBar 9
105 - There are jizzing vibrators/******, not that I would know.
mel_aka_mic 5
Wait.. If OP and his wife use other forms of birth control, she wouldn't need a condom if she was cheating.. Maybe a teenage child getting it on in the room?
DevDev12 0
^Because pregnancy is the ONLY danger of sex, right?
syki 22
68 - Jesus... *Five or six years?* Everybody's all caught up on the condom thing, but what about the suggestion that OP suspect his twelve- and thirteen-year-old children? I mean, I know some kids start early, but god, not *all* of them.
livingdaLife 5
113 - very sharpp, likey!
livingdaLife 5
120 too! :p
Sing_Along 7
Do you have any kids? If so you probably have a babysitter that is in their teens most likely.
KiddNYC1O 22
Hey, leave the buttsecks to Buttsexpirate!
VoteForTaco 8
Smack dat ho!
tjv3 10
You might be happily married but she must not be
charlie8u3478 0
Could be one of op's children that used the condom...
blushy 14
ever hear of the seven year itch..just saying
tomakobriefs 11
Just a thought, but if OP was only married for 7 years, it's possible that any kids they have are younger than 7. I know there aren't enough characters to mention potential previous relationships/offspring, but still...
FireGamer 2
Maybe...a robber broke in and had safe rape?
steve412 0
Don't be quick to assume things. You'll make things worse.
Mister_Triangle 21
What else could the explanation be?
Conner93MB 5
Their kids having sex in their bed? Why would the wife be stupid enough to leave a condom in the trash. And why would she need a condom if they are using other forms of birth control?
Chad_the_Brony 0
But that's the problem. We don't know if he has children or not. He didn't mention having any children that would be the typical new teen and fornicate with someone. Too many variables with this FML. but nonetheless, be careful about this. It could ruin an innocent marriage.
Almandine 7
They've been married 7 years. Unless they had kids before they got married, it's unlikely that they are having sex. It is possible that they have kids from another marriage or dating thoug.
xStaciexLynnx 15
48- Their kids would only be 7 (unless they had kids long before they got married) and people use condoms to try to help protect against STDs and to add extra birth control. The pill and other forms of female birth control are not 100% effective.
SignUpisntcool 3
One word-hobos.
bubbly31 0
I'm going with the babysitter cause if they did have kids after they were married they would be young and need one
dougierocks 13
You are a moron... Things are bad...
emilydotawesome 1
48- I'm pretty sure they wouldn't be using condoms to prevent against STDs if they had already been married 7 years.. Just saying.
TheMathMajor 26
197, that's the point. They don't use condoms because they've been married and know they don't have STD's but if the wife is sleeping around it would make sense that she would use a condom to prevent getting an STD from someone else.
Kelsarella 1
Kids these days are having sex young, you never know... Last year we had pregnant 12 year olds in the community... And 10 year olds are having sex, 7 isn't too far from that. Kids are just growing up too fast for their own good.
amourmourant 18
I've read before that sometimes people who cheat will leave obvious hints to their partner so they'll find out and they won't have to actually fess up about it.
Unenunciable 14
I agree, not only could it be their kids, it could be anyone who visited the house, friends, family members, or even someone breaking into your house to have sex there (cause apparently that's fun to some people).
peterlikes 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe you should improve yur sex life to avoid foreign intruders coming between yur relationship.
toenibbler 14
*your.
bingababe 16
So everyone who has been cheated on should blame themselves??
Justforlolz 14
Was it that hard to type out that extra "o" to make yourself sound slightly less stupid?
KRS_13 0
5- I'm about to throw a dictionary at your face.
peterlikes 3
Shut the hell up 124...
kyarush 10
Yu need to lern how 2 spell.
babiebuntin 7
Time for some ass kicking I assume?
Heinousness 0
I assume you are correct.
Guren 0
Call 1-800-CHOKE-DAT-HOE
reenkaur 7
maybe you werent so 'happily' married in that case!
ladyLALAA 29
Or maybe it was one of their kids? But who goes through their rubbish?
omgcookeys 15
Well, his wife was happy! With another guy.
Ruffclue 9
umm they were married for 7 years. so i m asduming the kids are 6 or 7
Mister_Triangle 21
If he had kids, especially if they were teenaged, he would have mentioned it
ladyLALAA 29
Just a thought, sorry guys. He/his wife could have kids from previous relationships, etc. My family is a bit dysfunctional ha.
skyeyez9 25
They could have been together for 10 years before finally getting married. Not everybody in this day and age has kids after marriage.
ThaNamesBooth 10
36: why would he have mentioned if he has kids that could have done it? Not mentioning it makes a better FML.
wlddog 14
Tonight they won't be so happily married.
returnpolicy 3
160 - if he had teenage kids then the fml would either be entirely different or non existent
deviable 9
Try talking to her. She may not have an explanation, but you'll need to bring it up anyway.
lifesucks283 1
waamp. sucks.
laden_swallow09 35
Wha?
OhLohd111 11
What An Ass Munching Person? :o
Reality_bites 14
It seems strange that if she were indeed cheating that she would hide the evidence in plain sight of her husband by placing the used condom in the trashcan.
Llamacod 11
Yes because hiding a used condom in her underware drawer makes a much more sense to hide it
glittercookies 12
It would make more sense if she wrapped it up in a napkin and pushed it deep in the trash.
j_cat187 20
Or have her lover deal with the condom
dougierocks 13
Maybe she thought the guy would flush it instead of throwing if away.
ApologyKick 25
Maybe she was hinting at something by leaving it in plain sight?
cmcmluver 0
do u have a pool boy? if so mystery solved! :D
mikeymayhem_87 15
Could be the mailman :p
dubberton 0
It's always the milkman come on now!
cr3ativity 15
Its the plumbers these days.
bizarre_ftw 22
DNA test anyone? Send the dog for the mailman, cat on the milkman, ...... Turtle on the poolboy? Or adopt an alligator?