Today, I wanted to eat my last bowl of sugary cereal before starting my new diet. I fell down the stairs with the full bowl in hand. Message received, universe. FML
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Today, I got out of my bed and immediately stepped into a half-eaten bowl of cereal. FML
Today, I'd finally got home from a 15-hour shift at work and wanted to lay down and eat. I poured myself a bowl of cereal, went to my room, and sat it on my bed. My dog then jumped right on my bed and yanked the sheets off, causing the cereal to fly everywhere. FML
Today, I was eating a bowl of cereal and noticed something float to the top. On closer inspection, it turned out to be a mouse turd. I had already eaten half the bowl. FML
Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast. I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful. Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth. FML
Today, I was having a hard time waking up. When I sat down for breakfast, my chair rocked backwards. I reflexively grabbed out at something to hold on to. Unfortunately, I grabbed the cereal box that was on the table. FML
Today, I was rushing to walk home because my stomach was upset. I dodged multiple people, getting closer and closer, got my front door open, got up my stairs, and then lost control of my bowels on the top step. FML
Today, I was carrying a bowl of cereal to the couch when my cat ran between my feet. I somehow saved every drop of milk but launched the cereal across the room. My cat immediately ate the cereal off of the floor and then walked away looking like he had planned it. FML
Today, I went to the kitchen to grab some cereal. I guess my mum didn't hear me, because as I entered, I heard her ranting to herself about her, "goddamn fucking Cheerios". I started to slowly back out, but I tripped over my own feet. She heard and yelled at me for "sneaking around". FML
Today, after spending an exhausting amount of time trying to stay quiet so I didn’t wake my housemates, even to the point of catching the microwave before it went off, I dropped my bowl of food right in the middle of the hallway between the bedrooms with a loud clang. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs while reading the 'mind your step' sign. FML
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Top comments
TXFernwoods 26
Fill another bowl! Screw the universe :P
Welshite 39
I've always wanted to birth a star.
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Comments (76)
syed121417 22
That really sucks OP. Happens to he best of us, don't worry, have something else sugary instead
GodPart2 20
Ummmm, no.... when the universe (the Force, your sub conscience, whatever you wanna call it) tells you to stop something, you stop it then and there... One does not tempt further Universe fury
Pleonasm 35
I think the universe quite simply showed that gravity does indeed still exist!;
barakados 11
I think op ate a gigantic bowl of unlucky charms.
KSIPanda2 6
Why was he eating cereal on the stairs?
Adev_fml 10
One does not simply start a diet without having one last snack. You are not you when you are hungry...
TwinkleToes7 15
Awe, that sucks! I hope your okay!! You could still eat yummy cereal to reward yourself after your diet?
parism143 28
Doesn't that sort of defeat the purpose of a diet?
TwinkleToes7 15
Not if you eat something small like a bowl of cereal..
TallMist 32
You can eat everything in moderation... Except bacon. One can never have too much bacon.
TXFernwoods 26
Fill another bowl! Screw the universe :P
Welshite 39
I've always wanted to birth a star.
Pleonasm 35
So NOW I understand why they called it the Big Bang.
famvd 15
These are the best comments ever.
OperationAxis 10
These ****** puns.. I love it
little92 13
Lmao.. Those comments made my night.. Thank ya all
TrendyBee 4
...Not sure if "last bowl" quite registered when you proposed this solution
R3C0V3RY101 10
Trix are for ******* kids!
ptoka 20
I hope not, that's just... Wrong
billiejoeinabox 7
Trix are life.
threer 30
Well, he's not wrong.. How do you get the kid in the van to **** 'em? You trick 'em.
Crazynocatlady 22
Not cool, man. Not cool.
gaydragon 13
Going on a diet isn't as bad as some people think! just take it in baby steps and you'll be the healthier person you are striving for before you know it, hope you're alright as well.
FYL_justsayin 9
Universe, could you be just a little more subtle?
ImAFaker 29
Hey, at least the universe is helping!
Pleonasm 35
Exactly. The universe will always give you a little push in the right direction. Sometimes you don't notice it, and sometimes you're precariously perched at the top of the stairs.
GhettoXmuffin 7
Or maybe the universe is telling you that you should invest in an elevator
askullnamedbilly 33
Dieting doesn't work, you'll just bounce back to your original weight once you decide the diet is over and go on to 'reward' yourself for your hard work. Slowly change your eating habits to be more healthy and exercise.
austin101123 3
I don't even get why he wouldn't eat cereal. cereals contain sip much vitamins and so little calories for a meal.
mssommer 4
You're kidding, right? Cereals, even the "healthy" ones are some of the most high-calorie things you can eat! Total no-go on a diet
gaydragon 13
you just made my day, by far the funniest comment I've seen on FML
OhWhoCares 42
It's alright OP. Look at it as a motivating factor. Clean up the mess, and then throw out the rest of the sugary cereal and start your new healthy eating habits a day early :)