Food and Animals: Yummy

Yummy

By munckncruncj15 - 22/10/2009 04:19 - United States

Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 240

You deserved it 36 935

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Same thing different taste

By Shinobi_3 - 26/02/2010 17:43 - United States

Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 833

You deserved it 29 322

By cockroach - 27/09/2009 15:52 - United States

Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 320

You deserved it 16 744

By Username - 25/05/2010 12:32 - France

Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 098

You deserved it 36 192

By dumbblonde - 06/08/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 273

You deserved it 62 319

By Ew-dles - 09/09/2017 20:00

Today, I was finishing a bowl of ramen while watching a video. As I scooped up the last bits, I realized the clump of seasoning I had been saving for last was actually a dead fly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 425

You deserved it 627

By Ser17 - 10/08/2011 17:47 - United States

Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 920

You deserved it 5 897

Nutshot

By DanJames24 - 10/06/2021 21:01 - United Kingdom

Today, a work colleague was trying to kill a fly that was buzzing around the place. I was about to go on my break, but was stopped because she missed the fly and accidentally whacked me in the balls in the process. By the time I didn’t feel sick anymore, my break was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 76

By laurenmichela - 12/10/2015 21:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I coughed so much I threw up, then whilst recovering from throwing up, a fly flew into my mouth and I ate it. I then promptly threw up again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 630

You deserved it 2 095

By jess - 07/03/2010 14:08 - South Africa

Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 023

You deserved it 4 682

By Modeon123 - 20/10/2016 10:11 - Korea, Republic of - Seoul

Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 469

You deserved it 1 163

moonsolomon 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 12:41

Last I checked, when people wiped their mouths, the napkin didn't come in contact with the tongue... and wouldn't you feel it on your lips before just absently licking? And then remember about the dead fly and think ICK and wipe it off again? Just, y'know, asking.

Peroxide 3

Thursday 22 October 2009 12:44

Mr Miyagi would be so proud Wax on wax off bitch

Comments

Poke_my_mon 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 14:30

It would've been ninja skills if you caught it with Chopsticks....

_Naboo_ 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 20:26

^THIS. Unless you can catch it with chop sticks, you deserve it. The fly god is unhappy with you.

Jonathan33 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 14:47

it's not karma dipshit. you're just really stupid and wiped your mouth with a dirty napkin. big difference guy

perdix 29

Thursday 22 October 2009 14:55

YDI for thinking you have ninja skills and that they are "amazing." I hope that you get some bits of the fecal matter flies usually carry with them.

aback 4

Thursday 22 October 2009 15:23

So, how do bug guts taste? A little Tabasco might help.

thematt_fml 0

Friday 23 October 2009 2:06

hot suace helps w/ everything

capthavoc123 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 15:32

That's not karma. You're just an idiot.

Syn_fml 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 17:06

FML submitters need to stop putting "karma" in every goddamn post they have.

GriefBacon 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 17:06

What the **** does karma have to do with this?

FerrariCake 2

Thursday 22 October 2009 17:19

This isn't an FML. The taste of bug guts will be very temporary, but your awesome ninja skills will last forever. You win.

Byrnevictim 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 17:47

Ninja Skills? Are you 4?

FarSide 22

Thursday 22 October 2009 18:09

Well, I guess it's a good thing you were not sitting on the toilet and using toilet paper to kill the fly.... might have an aftertaste of bug guts and undigested corn....