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Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML
Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML
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Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
Today, I walked in on my mom, legs spread and changing her tampon, all while she was carrying on a conversation on the phone. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
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Top comments
livgasms 4
classy.
Lukeloveshugs 8
Why didn't you just leave? its not as if she can follow you while taking a dump.
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Comments (188)
littlejellybean1 0
lmao same thing happened to me when I was 14
lizabeth131 0
she couldn't of picked a better time.
andreafml2011 0
guys you don't get it duh! IT'S FOR SOUND EFFECTS! (:
ElizaCatherine1_fml 0
lolololc;
KidCudi227 0
yay my story was posted:) any way.. the door wasn't closed, very awkward :P
rainbowdinosaur 0
congrats!
lovebeecharmer 6
it's her fetish
Mach10 0
We are a pretty lousy society--You're more disturbed about the idea of your mom taking a dump than you are about trivializing a necessary and important part of life (i.e sex) by euphemizing it with that birds and bees nonsense. My parents were the same way, open doors etc. All three of my brothers and I ended up just fine.
AmethystRain 20
Just fine... In bed together.
LifeSucks1216 0
what's the bird and bees talk ?
Mach10 0
Probably something agricultural.
andreafml2011 0
It's about a bird teasing a bee and the bee shoves his stinger in the birdies hole. :3
andreafml2011 0
It's about a bird teasing a bee and the bee shoves his stinger in the birdies hole. :3
Superflykid 5
Is she Mexican,?
smexehXredhead0 0
How pleasant...