Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
Today, three weeks after my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, she admitted it was a lie. Turned out it was just a test to see if I'd break up with her or not. I didn't, but I did just break the bank buying all the things we'd need for an actual kid. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up denial and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML
Today, a girl I’ve been fucking told me she’s pregnant after she told me she took the pill. What she really meant was, “Oh, that pill? That was Advil ‘cause I get headaches.” The bitch knows I have a wife and kids. She callously said, “Should've been more specific.” She can’t understand why I’m freaking out. FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened, he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
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Top comments
metalguy95 11
you both deserve it
marylovesyou8D 7
don't lie.
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Comments (143)
daniferrr 0
Should have thought about the possible consequences before hand. No one is going to feel bad for you and your poor decisions.
_crayola_ 1
You idiots
llamagangster 0
Abortion time!!!!
sarahbear430 0
yay!
forza_italia88 2
#22 get ****** -.-
miraggg 1
57 cry me a river
Lehk 9
yea really, get yourselves to a clinic sooner rather than later, some teabagger states have been making it harder to get one so you might need to catch a greyhound bus and go to another state, better to find out sooner than close to too late.
mdwilde 7
Ah, abortion...the solution to all the world's problems! I still don't know why people are so shocked when sex results in a child.
DenBriZel 31
Abortion shouldn't be used as a alternative to birth control. People that think that way piss me off.
TitaniumSilver 0
Who's the daddy now? haha
aeroliontvw 4
that doesn't mean that SHE lied. the pill isn't reliable at all.
DncrHap 9
the pill is incredibly reliable. that's why it exists.
smoke_eater05 0
the pill works. haven't knocked up my current gf yet...although, I knock up my last one...for me, it's 50/50...
DenBriZel 31
You shouldn't sound proud of that. Plus, I hate the term "knocked up". It's so degrading.
ViviMage 40
The pill is very reliable, provided the female takes it on a normal basis.
carbivore 10
The pill is over 99% effective. Most effective temporary birth control (counting implants and IUDS as rather permanent).
FMLMaximus 23
No, the pill is not nearly as effective as one may think. http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison_of_birth_control_methods
luna4545 4
how can u not tell the condom broke..as a girl who has experienced it there is 1 a big difference in feeling and 2 for us there was a popping noise that was hard to miss.. not mention when a guy cums in u without a condom you kinda notice the wet white stuff all over that area
Arisakentaro 0
pills don't always work ._.
davek 36
Or she was taking antibiotics or something? Either way, ever heard of Plan B?
guestxxx 0
Plan B doesn't work if the woman is pregnant.
holly_fly 34
No, but if she had taken it it could have PREVENTED it altogether.
dc295 3
seriously i mean if u morons decide to keep the kid remember whatever he/she does is ur fault automatically cause he/she was an accident and u two would probably make horrible parents.
xStarKillerx 4
Does it count as an accident if they both knew what they were doing?