Today, my girlfriend wanted to try something new in the bedroom, so she got an assortment of different sized cock rings. She laughed when the one we were trying to use kept falling off, and said to try a smaller one. It was the smallest in the set. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I'd dated girls with smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
Today, a guy informed me that the cute, really tiny little leather bracelet with little silver hearts and several snaps that I'd found in a head shop is actually a cock ring. I'm a girl. FML
Today, my girlfriend was telling me how sometimes things seem pretty impressive at first, but can turn out to be colossal disappointments when you try them out. "Like your cock," she bitterly finished. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake from her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML
Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
To be fair, if she is happy with you then there isn't any need to feel insecure.
jlaginski 10
It's not the size of the ship but the motion of the ocean. Keep rockin the boat!
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Comments (124)
Monkerz 3
You're supposed to put your balls through it as well as your ****.... so don't worry.
perdix 29
I can't imagine putting a ring on my ****. I think he'd look rather dashing with a scarf, an ascot or even a ... *Lowers sunglasses* dickey.
BrodieMike 4
Usually when bought in a set, the small one goes on the dick, the medium is for the balls, and the large goes over both
strangeite 4
We're you using it properly?
vbecka 17
maybe it was a set with fairly large ones? don't worry op, I'm sure there's something out there for you :) and your girlfriend is a keeper!
TheCanucklehead 22
It's ok short stuff. I'm sure she meant well. I know your a little mad and a tiny bit embarrassed, but don't worry. We all have these little faults. It'll be ok my diminutive friend
Enslaved 36
You're probably wearing it incorrectly. Maybe if it was called **** and balls ring, it would be clearer how to put it on.
posie97 18
You should master ate more often... It helps make it bigger. Slowly, but surely
Enslaved 36
The penis isn't a muscle so it won't grow any bigger no matter how much you "master ate" it.
vintaqe 28
This is why you don't buy toys for your ****.
DDante 3
Hmm. Now remember, a cockring doesn't simply fit over your ****; it encircles your entire package , that is, around the base of your **** and behind your sac. Putting it only around your **** may have been the reason only the smallest one would fit.