Sex and Intimacy: Toxic

Toxic

By makeupsex - 14/02/2012 11:25 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he put me through so much heartache last year was because the make-up sex was awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 268

You deserved it 5 248

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Same thing different taste

By misunderstood - 05/09/2010 10:56 - Australia

Today, after having a fight with my boyfriend, we had what I thought to be the best make-up sex, because he seemed so happy and upbeat. Turns out he misunderstood. He was happy because he thought it was break-up sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 643

You deserved it 6 367

By ohemmgeee - 31/12/2010 11:11 - Australia

Today, I found out that my boyfriend purposely makes me cry because it makes him feel special. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 109

You deserved it 5 243

By Anonymous - 09/12/2013 22:41 - United States - Lihue

Today, my boyfriend told me I'm beautiful. Before I could thank him, he continued, "Too bad it takes a shit-load of makeup." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 772

You deserved it 7 721

By serenti - 13/10/2011 21:30 - Sweden

Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 146

You deserved it 7 023

Kinky

By Anonymous - 23/08/2022 12:00 - United States - Fpo

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. Once we were cool, we decided to have makeup sex. I tried to change position so we could 69, but I then accidently kicked him in the head. He thinks I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 270

By brokenhearted - 05/12/2012 11:29 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my boyfriend sent me so many nice texts that he made me fall in love with him that little bit more. It turns out he was sweetening me up before telling me he cheated on me the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 161

You deserved it 2 598

By VoodooPriestess - 04/07/2019 04:00

Today, my boyfriend told me the reason he dated me was because he was lonely, and I looked lonely enough to like him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 712

You deserved it 157

By Username - 08/07/2011 06:12 - United States

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his friends about how great the sex was last night, and how he loves to "make a bitch bend over". We've been dating for 3 years, and haven't made love in several weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 571

You deserved it 6 692

By PlayboyBunny - 19/02/2011 07:20 - United States

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 616

You deserved it 8 636

By sadgf - 25/02/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said that being with me was his payment for past sins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 726

You deserved it 6 110

Idonebeenhad 17

Tuesday 14 February 2012 15:56

Not gonna be your boyfriend for much longer, I hope

dmblonde 13

Tuesday 14 February 2012 15:57

That's when you break up with him so he won't get anymore makeup sex from you.

Comments

yaoifreak 8

Tuesday 14 February 2012 22:53

Awww that's so sweet........not

sweetdreams20 0

Tuesday 14 February 2012 23:11

Boyfriend really? Still?

daminantion 14

Wednesday 15 February 2012 13:25

Your dp will stay with that song forever now.. Lol xD

greenmen 12

Tuesday 14 February 2012 23:57

The make up sex is the best ! Sorry to offend anyone

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 15 February 2012 0:07

It is awesome.

keymmachine 1

Wednesday 15 February 2012 1:35

Looks like he's trying to get some again

omarzrgz 3

Wednesday 15 February 2012 1:38

Your crazy!! Make up sex is the best type of sex! So I benefits both of u

cruisinslow 4

Wednesday 15 February 2012 1:54

Work together to have awesome sex without it having to be make up sex

bizarre_ftw 21

Wednesday 15 February 2012 3:43

Stop having sex with him when he ***** up

SoultheWolf 19

Wednesday 15 February 2012 4:27

It sucks he did that to you but you shouldn't have give him make up sex when he's treating you like shit.

happilyever2012 6

Wednesday 15 February 2012 4:58

Did you dump his ass?

Keywords

Social Media Love Stalker Instagram Spiders Ironic Animals Embarrassing Phobias Ecology Health Bikes Transportation Drunk Work AITA Poopoo peepee Facebook Geek Weird Vacation Mysterious Gamers Video games Gross First Dates Smells Parents Technology Annoying

The Top

Today, I found out that my toxic mother-in-law's retirement plans include moving in with us when she gets old. The death glares I’m getting from my wife right now are so worth the satisfaction I got from telling that evil old bat I’d burn the house down first before I let her move into it with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 578

You deserved it 83

Today, I tried to nicely talk to my daughter about her rapid weight gain. Having a family history of weight-related illness, I felt it was necessary. I offered to get thyroid tests, teach her to buy healthy food, and start routine exercise. She told everyone I called her a cow and had fat-shamed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 192

The Top

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 054

You deserved it 13 446

Today, it was nice out, so I drove with my car windows down. I was stopped trying to turn onto a busy highway, when a car turned off the highway right next to me, hit a pothole, and splashed dirty water into my window and into my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 063

You deserved it 4 174

Today, sleeping in a little late, I was woken up by my phone. Still tired, I quickly checked the display to realize it was my girlfriend calling. I pick up the phone saying, "Hey baby girl!" She seemed pretty startled, so I double-checked and realized it was my new boss, who has the name as my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 646

You deserved it 528

Today, I wasn't feeling too good, and took my temperature. I had a fever, which I told my boyfriend who was laughing hysterically when I told him. I asked him what was so funny, turns out he's been using the thermometer to take our dog's temperature sometimes. Rectally, of course. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 549

You deserved it 5 578

Today, my college dormitory accused me of something I didn't do, breaking a law that I never heard of, charged me $200 to fix "what I did wrong", and is forcing me to go to counciling at the school. Not only was I not on campus when it happened, but I was the one who reported the problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 975

You deserved it 777

Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 326

You deserved it 5 840

Toxic

Same thing different taste

Kinky

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